Tenderhearted
Lisa Andrews-Lafoon
Personal Development Coach, Yavapai Trails Association, Amateur Landscape Photographer, and Hiker
November 11, 2020
Ephesians 4: 31-32
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
I don’t often quote biblical scripture in my blog, but lately a few inspired words have been flowing through my mind. The above scripture is part of the flow. This in a nutshell has been my personal development goal for the last year and many years prior, letting bitterness and harsh words go and instead allowing for tenderness and forgiveness. So much of this year has been focused on the negative events in our lives (and boy, there have been plenty!) that it feels like we no longer can focus on the beautiful. And human-kindness is one of the most beautiful things to behold. It is time friends, to let a spirit of kindness back in, to be tenderhearted.
That word, tenderhearted, has been one of the descriptive words applied to me through my entire life. It has not always been used as a compliment either. Usually it is an insinuation that I am weak, of heart or of mind. I give some leeway for this, as I do tend to cry easily (I might have a tear in my eye right now). However, being tenderhearted is not weakness. It takes courage to allow your heart to be touched by someone or something. It is never easy to feel the hurt, either your own or another’s. Really though, only through tenderness will we be able to work with one another, build relationships, alliances, and solve problems. Being tenderhearted allows us to understand that our fellow humans are all just doing the best they can. Tenderness doesn’t necessarily mean letting a person’s bad behavior go unanswered, but it does allow for forgiveness. We can protect and defend our families and communities and still have tenderness. Harsh words, rage, anger, and slander are not protections. They are dangerously blinding to real understanding and in reality a mask of fear. So that is my argument for us all to be brave, be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving. This work starts deep within ourselves, but let’s go deep and do the work. The best recommendation I have ever heard regarding this is start with yourself. Be tenderhearted with yourself. Forgive yourself. Be kind to yourself. Then move on to your family, friends, co-workers, and community. Then widen your circle even more…
Love and Kindness to you!
Lisa
This blog post originally posted on www.lisa-andrews-lafoon.com