Telstra, black marks, never mind Black Friday
went shopping at Telstra yesterday to buy a new phone. Reminded me why I never darken their door. Quite possibly the worst customer service interaction I've had. It started by being ignored for a good 10 minutes as I hung around the phone section. Making eye contact with a number of employees that were just having a good old chat with each other. Despite it being black Friday-week (is that what we are calling it these days) it was basically dead. Then the 'concierge' asked me if I was all right. Possibly sensing it was getting awkward in the store. So I told him, I would like to transact money for a phone. He then quoted the wrong price. I corrected him, he checked, apologised, then slunk back off into the back of the store to check if they actually had any. He returned and motioned me to the 'lounge' a rather uncomfortable-looking bench. He then brought across someone introduced as Owen. I was then dragged back to Owens desk which was right near where I had just been standing.
Owen wasn't much of a talker. So he got on his laptop and started bashing keys. He asks which model, I tell him. He bashes more keys. He asks for driver's licence, I question why. (I only want to by a phone!) He tells me it's policy. He spends more time bashing keys..time starts to drift and bend, he's spending an inordinate amount of time bashing his keyboard not saying a word. Kinda reminded me of Immigration at Heathrow, but with less humour.
He then asks if I have a Telstra account. I tell him no. He looks hurt, confused perplexed. He asks if I have ever been a Telstra customer. Now I have to admit, we are going back a decade, but I said I was possibly a customer at one time. At this point. I've been in the store 30 minutes. Not having a chat with Owen. Another customer who came in after me has come in, chosen the same phone, purchased it and walked out. So I'm starting to wonder if there is a problem. Owen disappears into the back of the store! WTF. He comes back 5 minutes later with the manager. She makes the sort of grimacey smile you make when you are just forcing it and not really meaning it.
We have to be at 40 minutes now. She asks if I've ever been a customer again. What is it with you and your ex customers. Maybe a long time ago I explain. She and Owen then bash a lot of keys and eventually decide. He's not a customer. Create him a profile as a PAYG.
Jesus, I would have paid you the $2 bucks 35 minutes ago if that was all it took just to make this torture stop.
So Owen creates a user profile, in order that I may have a phone number that won't be activated to purchase a phone.
He then disappears out the back and comes back with the box, finally, I think. He's busy putting in serial numbers etc. Then he takes the payment. And I'm like, and that's it, you give me the box and I go.
No no no. He then OPENS the BOX! and slap in the face after slap in the face, takes the screen protector off and powers on MY phone that I've just been looking forward to my own unboxing thank you. You absolute heathen. Taking off the plastic is what we look forward to!
I exclaim, what are you going!.
It's policy, we need to make sure it turns on before you leave.
Why!!?! do you warranty it, better than 谷歌 !?
Then he put it back in the box. Types some more stuff and after another 5 minutes. just says, "that's it"
And I was you know waiting for the 'thanks for coming in' or 'thanks for your business' no no, just awkward silence like I was now preventing him from going back to his Netflix.
The whole excruciating experience took over an hour. And they have the audacity to send me an email to 'Rate Owen's customer service skills
Never, never, never ever again