Teachers, Parents, and Coaches… or Race Car Drivers?

What this weekly newsletter is all about: Analyzing, discussing, and prescribing best practices for families in both education and youth sports. Please follow, share, or comment. Thank you!

Newsletter content:

1. Overview;
2. Article of the week;
3. Podcast of the week;
4. Video of the week;
5. Exercise of the week

---------

Overview--> Being responsible for the well being of another human being of any age can be disquieting. When that human being is in a crucial stage of development and can be permanently affected, positively or negatively, by a single decision we make, the stakes are that much higher.

There is a plethora of reports about the vast number of on the fly decisions that teachers make in the classroom everyday. "Teachers make 1,500 decisions a day. ONE THOUSANDS FIVE HUNDRED DECISIONS. If research estimates are correct, those 1,500 decisions equals about 4 decisions each minute you are teaching." A study by "Researcher Philip Jackson (p. 149) said that elementary teachers have 200 to 300 exchanges with students every hour (between 1200-1500 a day), most of which are unplanned and unpredictable calling for teacher decisions, if not judgments."

Forgive the hyperbole, but that many decisions on the fly makes us more like a race car driver than not, right? Constant adjustments, recalculations, assessments of danger, and so on. Or maybe jazz musicians and NBA basketball superstars are better analogies.

“Effective teachers, then, like top jazz musicians and NBA basketballers, improvise, decide on the spot–as they deal with both the routine and unexpected in the art of teaching.”

Further complicating this already tense endeavor is that our internal biases can affect how our message is transmitted, thereby impacting how young people ultimately feel about themselves. We bring baggage with us from our own childhoods, and if we are not self aware enough then we may unintentionally pass along the bad lessons, or even trauma, that we experienced.

Coaches, teachers, and parents need to do the self analysis necessary to make sure that we are not unintentionally signaling something to young people which they then internalize and can derail their development. As with most dangerous things in life, the likelihood and severity of injury decreases after we are taught what could go wrong and how to protect ourselves and those around us.

---------

Article of the week--> "Expectation, Bias, and the Profound Effect Coaches Can Have on Youth Sport." EHS News. Some of my favorite takeaways and quotes:

Feedback should...

1. be both positive and information-based.
2. support player autonomy.
3. support a growth mindset.
4. also create an environment that is free from bias.

One decision can have long lasting ramifications.

“Never underestimate the power of a coach to make an impact. Especially in youth sport, where coaches can influence young athletes in ways that can reach far beyond a single game, or even an entire season.”

Coaches are not only another adult role model, they may actually become MORE important than parents for a period of time.

“Horn says. 'Particularly between ages of eight and 16 or 18, the coach becomes the primary figure. More important than the parents. That starts at eight. But increases in importance into high school.'"

We need to be aware of our own internal biases in order to limit damage.

“It may be common knowledge to say that good coaching can help build confidence, character, persistence, and pride. But the expectations that coaches set, the biases they hold, and the feedback they give can also determine, accelerate, or completely derail the trajectory of entire athletic careers.”

Coaches feedback is so important because young people are looking for others to tell them about self worth.

“'Until they get to 12, 13, or 14, they can't really self-evaluate. So as a parent, as a teacher, as a coach, the kind of feedback that I give has a lasting influence. Because you are basically telling them: Are you good at this? What can you do to get better? How do you fit in with your peers?'”

---------

Podcast of the week--> I found this podcast via Tim Ferriss' "5 Bullet Friday" email newsletter (which I highly recommend). Ep. 207: “Getting Free with Karma Yoga”?on the?Ram Dass Here And Now?podcast.

Now that this newsletter has harped upon the grave responsibility of adults and how we can easily and even unintentionally screw up the young people that we truly care about, let's turn to how we need to let that trepidation go at some point. This is necessary for our own sanity, but also to enable us to be the leader that we want to be and that is most likely to help our young people begin to learn to navigate the world on their own.

It is striking how the principles of so many different ideologies, religions, and lifestyles mirror each other. While not specifically about teaching or coaching, Karma Yoga illustrates how we can try to find what our "dharma" is, listen to that, and then use every situation in life as an opportunity to connect to the universal truths.

"The art of karma yoga is taking the actions that you do everyday, listening to hear that they are the actions that are most harmonious of the total gestalt that you find yourself in...keep listening to it all...then you do what you do. Keep centering so you do not get lost in the doing of it. How it comes out is how it comes out. You did it as impeccably as you could. With a goal in mind but not attached to whether the goal is realized. So you end up being absolutely at peace all the time."

Accept that you have done the work necessary and now all you can do is be at peace with what comes. The young person needs that autonomy, and will eventually find it no matter how much we want to bubble wrap them.

"I am doing what I can do and it will be what it will be."

In Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse Five the refrain during times of incomprehensible carnage is "So it goes". This is not an expression of desire for tragedy, but rather an admittance that no amount of anxiety can future proof our lives or the lives of those we love most.

"Those of you that have raised children must have noticed that no matter how well you do it, kids turn out the way kids turn out. You can't create a product, you can only create an environment through which a process happens."

---------

Video of the week--> "Teaching Isn't Rocket Science. It's Harder.": Max Ray-Riek

I love the way Max dismisses the fallacies that teaching is hard because you are surrounded by needy young people constantly making you adjust your pre-ordained picture perfect lesson plan, and can never find time to go to the bathroom. That is light work. Being around hilarious and mercurial young people is what makes teaching fulfilling.

This is what really makes teaching harder than rocket science:

"Teaching has to do with the managing of really complex tasks over and over again. And so many tasks crammed into each minute."

And not only knowing content, but being able to transmit it empathetically to many different types of people, at one time.

"Teachers make complex educational decisions on the fly, over and over again, based on really deep knowledge of content, and understanding students empathetically as math learners and as people."

---------

Exercise of the week-->

1. List the teachers, coaches, and parental figures that were impactful in your life.
2. Make a table with the "Positive" and "Negative" life lessons that you took from them.
3. Then under each life lesson, list HOW those axioms were imparted.
4. Highlight what you would like to pass on to the young people in your life. * what you will most definitely NOT be transmitting.
5. If feasible, tailor the method of communication for each individual young person you interact with, or if you are in a pinch, then at least a general picture (such as age, personality, circumstance, etc) that can then be adapted on the fly.
6. Review your leadership style periodically, specifically using some formative assessment to gauge if the young people are receiving and internalizing what you are trying to convey.
7. Then let things fall as they may. You have done the due diligence, put in the effort, and reviewed appropriately. Now things will be what they will be.

---------

See you next week!