Teachable Moments Are Everywhere

Topic for this week: Foot in Mouth Syndrome...

I witnessed a VERY uncomfortable situation at an intimate presentation earlier this week. The presenter made an assumption of someone's gender based on appearance.

To be clear, the purpose of this email is not to create an open discussion about gender identify, pronouns, and etc.?The point that I want to make for those in business who are presenting to the general public is BE MINDFUL of your audience.

Simply put: just because someone fits a certain description doesn't mean they may identify that way. Keep it neutral/general labels if in front of a crowd (person, individual, people, business owner, or identify them based on something in front of them or physically on their person) or in private - ask them their name and/or their pronouns but move away from gender specific labels such as: sir, ma'am, lady, gentleman, man, woman, etc.?

Everyone makes mistakes and while the individual kept their cool, you could FEEL the shift and detachment in the room - mainly because you saw the initial discomfort on the targeted individual's face.?

As this presenter unintentionally insulted a decision maker (i.e. the person who hired him), he may have severed any ties that that person could have provided.

You may be asking yourself, "Was it really that bad"? Yes...yes it was...

Presenter: Excuse me, gentleman in the bowtie.

* Everyone in the room is aware who is being identified, as this person is the "Head Honcho", and knows this is about to go south fast...

Individual looks around along with everyone else.

Presenter: Yes, you sir - can you please read the slide for me.

Individuals cheeks turn red but as a professional, simply does what is asked.

Presenter: Oh! Are you a woman?

You could hear a pin drop. Associates of Individual start to get defensive about the gender label being placed on the Individual and one person speaks up and says "Sam is Sam!"

Individual sees situation is starting to escalate and to defuses it simply says: "Yes, I am a woman", shakes their head and looks down.

Presenter begins to fumble trying to recover, pointing out features that he deemed confusing - suit, haircut, etc. Presentation is officially dead in the water at this point.

Don't lose your momentum and/or your audience over something avoidable.?

Again, it happens and hopefully the presenter learned from this. If not, at least the rest of us in the room walked away with a valuable lesson.

We now return you to your?regularly scheduled programming already in progress.

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