Talk About It a Little, a Lot.

This is a business post.

My daughter has a disease called Usher syndrome.? Kids with Usher syndrome are born deaf and eventually lose their vision to retinitis pigmentosa.? It is a terrifying diagnosis for parents.? Most do not have experience with hearing loss so they are struggling to understand how to raise a child with that condition.? Then the genetic testing comes back and they learn about the potential vision loss.? It is devastating.

As parents, we are programmed to protect our children from bad things.? Often the instinct of parents is to hide the diagnosis from their children.? They don’t want to discuss the potential vision loss because it is such a scary thing, like telling your children about nuclear war and the possible outcomes.? It feels like it is better to just not mention it unless or until it becomes necessary.

The problem is that the kids eventually figure it out.? They fail the vision portion of the driving test or, worse, they pass then get in a bunch of accidents.? They struggle in low light situations where their friends do not.? They start to think there is something wrong with them, that they lack the abilities of other ‘normal’ kids, at precisely the age when being different is terrifying.

Worse, when they find out that their parents have long known about their condition, they feel betrayed.? Why would you hide this from me, they ask?? Are you ashamed of me?? Their self-esteem, already low because they feel different from their peers, drops further.? In short, parents get exactly the opposite result they sought by hiding the diagnosis.

That’s why I tell parents of newly diagnosed children to talk about Usher syndrome a little, a lot.? Don’t sit down for an hour-long dissertation, attempting to explain genetics and predict the future.? The kid is going to be overwhelmed.? They are going to feel terrified, upset, angry.? You’re going to breakdown and get emotional.? Then the kid is going to immediately forget ninety-nine percent of what ?you said.? They will only remember that who they are is bad and makes you cry.

Instead, talk to them a little at a time and never be hesitate to bring it up.?

“Hey, you have Usher syndrome.? It’s the reason you have hearing aids/cochlear implants.? It also means you might not see well, particularly when it’s dark, so just be cautious.”

“Hey, remember you have Usher syndrome.? You should probably bring a flashlight with you when you go trick or treating because you can’t see great in the dark.”

“Hey, remember you have Usher syndrome so make sure your friends know you might need a hand on the stairs of the movie theatre.”

The reply from your child to every one of those will be a dismissive ‘yeah, yeah.? I know.’? It will NOT be an emotional collapse.? It will NOT make your child feel like you are embarrassed by their condition.? It WILL help them to accept who they are and adapt to it.

So talk about Usher syndrome with your child and talk about it a little, a lot.

But this is a business post.

When talking about cybersecurity with your employees, you should talk about it a little, a lot.? A single giant once a year training causes people to glaze over and tune out.? They forget ninety-nine percent of what they are told.? The best you accomplish is that you frighten everyone and raise their antenna.? But if you don’t follow up frequently, human nature is to assume that it is no longer a problem or that whatever they are currently doing is working fine.

Yet you can’t hold hour-long meetings on cybersecurity every week.? That would be torture and you’ll end up getting the opposite of the results you want.? People will be so sick of it that it will become a joke.

What you should do instead is talk about cybersecurity a little, a lot.? Include a sentence or a bullet point in every meeting, regardless of the topic.? Mention it in passing when troubleshooting an issue.? Include it as a line item in governance committees, in strategy meetings, in scrum standups.? It will become engrained in how they think, in how they act, but it won’t overwhelm them and it won’t become a joke.? It’s just something that is important enough to consider in the normal routine of the day whenever warranted.?

In short, it is the best way to build a culture of cyber security.? And you’ll know you’re there when any reminder brings a smile and a ‘yeah, yeah.? I know.’

If you’d like help building a culture of cybersecurity, I can be reached at [email protected].

If your family is dealing with Usher syndrome, please reach out as well.? I’m always happy to help in anyway I can.? And check out the Usher Syndrome Coalition.? They are the best single resource in the world on the disease.

Good luck!