A Tale of Two Cities: Reflecting on Life During a Global Pandemic

During my recent daily walk at the local middle school track, as is typical, I started thinking about my new career and leadership coaching business. I have been busy writing some “insight” articles for my new website, and I often use the exercise time to inspire fresh content.

I always have a lot swirling around in my head, and I often forget the fruits of my brainstorming walks. My new plan is that I will come home after my daily exercise, sit at the computer and try and compose something profound.

I have been very excited about developing blog posts in the first place. Why not? These days, countless people are weighing in on one thing or another. Whether it’s through Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, podcasts, TED talks or personal websites…everyone has become a self-proclaimed expert on something. I decided it was time for me to get up on that soapbox and make room for my own streams of consciousness.

This will be cool. Perhaps, from time to time, I can even camp out at the local Starbucks, with my laptop and an iced caffe latte close at hand and create the impression that I am penning a novel or writing a business plan for my new startup. After all, isn’t this the reason people hang out in cafes?!

As I was making my way around the track, I was feeling very energized about further developing my creative writing process. I was pumped about the seemingly endless supply of theories and insights I could highlight on my website. I actually contemplated cutting my walk short and heading home to develop an outline for a post about one of the ideas I was thinking about, embracing change. So many people around me are experiencing transitions lately, and I thought to myself, ‘this would be an appropriate topic.’ As the outline for the post started taking shape, and the ideas were firing on all cylinders, that is when reality set in.

 Just when I thought I was on auto pilot, sailing along with a completely optimistic and creative frame of mind, worries about Covid-19 smacked me in the head and hijacked my thought process. The narrative in my mind shifted in a nano second. Once again, I became a prisoner to thoughts about the global pandemic, the “shit-show”, if you will.

Yes, the shit-show. Many would agree this is an apt description for what we have been dealing with day and night for the past several months.

Thoughts about the shit-show took over my mood for the remainder of my walk. The ups and downs, the ins and outs, the yin and yang of life right now. I have never felt such extreme swings in my mood and outlook. I have felt incredibly perplexed about my future and the world around us. Yet, at the same time, I have also never felt more intellectually and emotionally alive. It was then and there that I quickly shifted gears and came up with the theme and the title for my next blog post. For sure, just like the walk at the track, life has been a “tale of two cities”, each day, each hour, each moment.

It was the worst of times…

As I continued walking, I was struck by the fact that we are truly battling several epic crises at once.

It feels like we are losing the fight against Covid-19. New cases surged in hot spots in the South and West. Health care facilities are being taxed beyond normal capabilities. Everyone is waiting for the other shoe to drop in the fall/winter when another expected spike in the virus may likely push us all to the point of no return. People are protesting the wearing of masks as a form of protection against becoming ill. The death rate in our country just surpassed 170,000. It certainly feels like we are losing.

We are likely on the brink of a prolonged and paralyzing economic regression. It was announced recently that the US economy suffered the worst quarter since World War II, as the GDP shrank by 32%. A staggering number of people are filing for unemployment benefits. Government and household budgets are failing, and many well-established brands are declaring bankruptcy. The positive stock market picture is likely not an accurate predictor of future economic stability.

We may possibly be in the middle of a major political realignment with the upcoming election. The incredibly divisive nature with which anything is being decided and acted upon these days, in my mind, is unprecedented.

Push for reforms in police departments and racial discrimination is sparking violence in some major cities with no end in sight. Many Americans are receiving a much-needed crash course in racial inequality. The lessons being learned are moving at an astonishing speed, and the rapidly changing narrative in our country has triggered some welcome policy changes, but has also stirred unrest, hostility and divisiveness.

In large cities across America murders are on the rise. Close to home, it has been nearly a quarter of a century since New York City experienced as much gun violence as it has throughout this summer.

And, as if all of this wasn’t enough, the powerful tropical storm Isaias recently paid us a friendly little visit, and in its wake left 2.2 million homes and businesses along the East Coast with no power for a few days. Talk about kicking folks when they are down!

 Depressed yet? Well, let me reflect on some of my own personal drama a little closer to home.

I don’t know about you, but the growth curve on our retirement account is a weird shape I have never seen before. I actually stopped looking at the summary page long enough to forget the username and password on our account. My change jar, though, is a little fuller. That’s encouraging.

A trip to the car dealership for an oil change and inspection now qualifies as a fun outing.

Under the guise of pretending to get organized and using down time effectively during quarantining at home, I have become an expert at moving piles of stuff around the house. Nothing actually gets weeded out or consolidated; we merely move clutter around and create the illusion we have actually made a dent in our hoarding habits.

I have not had a deep tissue massage in months. My back right now has the suppleness of a surfboard.

I also have a closet full of summer shorts which for some strange reason no longer fit. I think it’s so odd that they shrank in size just from sitting on the shelves!

But, the funny thing is…as much as there has been sadness, and drama, and anxiety…there has been creativity and innovation. There have been many strengthened relationships. There has been appreciation for activities long tucked away as childhood memories. There has been more true living in the moment and recognizing the beauty of what we have rather than focusing as much on what we don’t have.

It was the best of times…

During the height of the pandemic in NY, when hospitals were in over their heads, my daughter gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. From his first breath in this world, I loved him as intensely as if he were my own child. He is a beacon of hope and love in a world too often shrouded in darkness. When he is in my arms, I melt; when he is away from me, I count the minutes until I can stare at him and hold him close again. The times watching my daughter love her little boy have been a joy I can’t possibly describe. Just thinking about it moves me to tears.

I finally decided to launch my own career and leadership coaching business. Coaching professionals and helping others realize their true potential are passions which have always provided me real meaning and purpose. Pursuing an opportunity in retirement to share with others the wisdom and experience acquired in my career feels like it is right in my sweet spot. The opportunity to give something back and create a lasting legacy is what drives me to focus on this every day. I truly hope I can make a lasting difference in the lives of many professionals.

In the last few months, I have developed an incredibly powerful creative drive. I have been writing, creating inspirational slideshows, experimenting with black and white photography, developing musical playlists on Spotify, and designing a new business website. I like to think the part of my brain, which could very easily be consumed with negative and toxic information, is firing on cylinders in a whole different and positive direction. I am hopeful these powerful moments of insight and discovery allow me to share myself in my coaching practice and my personal life in a more vulnerable and authentic manner.

 My son and his girlfriend moved in with us for a few months while quarantining, and this was found time with them we never thought we would have. The experience of watching their relationship mature as they tackled problems and concerns was special. As they moved through the trials and tribulations of managing an internship, job furlough and a career transition, I had a bird’s eye view of all of this taking shape. I am extremely grateful that I am able to take away some very valuable insights and lessons learned through observing them, which I can hopefully apply to my new coaching business.

Lastly, I have thoroughly enjoyed the newly discovered happy hours, bike rides, Scrabble contests, Netflix binge watching and phenomenal meals with my wife. We are in the trenches side by side every day, and I think we have done a good job keeping each other and our family around us sane. Our shared values and priorities have kept us mostly off the “ledge” during the pandemic and have moved us even closer to family and friends. Life is a slippery slope most of the time, but when you have a strong and supportive co-captain, as I do, the weight of the journey seems a little lighter.

Yes, during these past several months there has been darkness, but there has also been light. There has been sadness, but there has also been an abundance of joy. There remains fear, but there is also eternal hope. It has been a tale of two cities, but when is life any different? We must learn to adjust and find ways to appreciate the simple pleasures. These times serve as a reminder that we can conquer anything, when we embrace what is most precious and meaningful.

I think I am ok with the yin and yang of life. The ups and downs keep us from getting too comfortable in either direction. You see, I am just simply grateful to be alive!