Taking Back the Power
Grant Herbert
Empowering today's great professional services technicians to become exceptional leaders | Executive Coach | Team Coach | Leadership Trainer and Mentor | Inspirational Keynote Speaker | Mental Health Advocate
Have you started yet another year doubting yourself — lacking confidence in your abilities? Perhaps you're still trying to seek the approval of others in everything that you do.
Well, stick with me because this week, I want to help you build a foundational competency to remove all that stuff from your life for good.
Hi, this is Grant Herbert, VUCA Leadership and Sustainable Performance Coach, and today I want to continue our conversation by helping you take back the power.
For most of my life, I cared far too much about what others thought of me. I was fighting against those 3 universal fears of not being good enough for people, not belonging and being a part of what I was involved in, and not being loved. This fear stops you from being who it is that you really could be.
Seeking approval from others was going to validate me. This is all about our identity and talks about not what you do but who you believe you are.
I was depleted of any personal power by my thoughts, the meanings I placed on past events, and what that meant about me.
On the exterior, I looked so confident. If you asked anyone else, they would say: “You can do anything, Grant. You can speak to anyone.” Other than that, my “results” from my technical roles within my employment were really good.
What was going on was like a swan gliding across the top of the water. It looked like everything was under control on to, however, underneath the water, the legs were flapping around to get that propulsion.
You may feel a little bit like that and put on this brave face (this front) that says: “Oh, I'm okay. I've got everything together.”
However, inside, you’re having this internal conflict and feeling less than you're feeling all the time. Some people call it the “imposter syndrome”, where you feel you're not worthy of the role that you're in, and surely someone's going to find out soon and catch me out on this lie that I'm living.
Well, this is all created by a lack of personal power.
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Personal Power is the ability to know that you've got everything within you and around you to get ahead in life. It's about being teachable and humble but realising you're on a journey.
It's about having confidence in your own ability to move forward and shift the needle towards where you want to go.
It's not about being perfect, and it's certainly not about taking power from others. It's about a power that comes from within to allow you to be who it is that you are created to be.
Imagine what your life would look like if you got up every morning and you were grateful for who you were. Imagine what you could do if you shifted some of this thinking around who you believe you are and who you believe you're not and started every day ahead of that curve.
To do that, it's about focusing firstly on your inner dialogue.
It's about retraining that mini-me, as I call it, that inner voice that holds you back and reminds you of what you can't do, what you haven't done, the mistakes that you've made, and every time that you've failed, rather than keeping an open mind and reminding you of the times when you could, and you did, and inspiring you to take a chance and do it again.
It's about removing from your thoughts what other people think of you as being what validates you.
I'm not talking about being arrogant here and not caring about anyone else. I'm talking about confidently knowing that you are still on a journey and you're still growing and learning, validating yourself and not taking the external to tell you who you are.
Your identity is your responsibility. It's not something to outsource to anyone else...
Grant Herbert (aka The People Builder) describes himself as an ordinary guy, with an outstanding wife and 5 amazing kids, who has a passion to help people escape the performance trap and regain their authenticity in every area of life. He is a VUCA Leadership Mentor, Sustainable Performance Coach, Master Coach Trainer in Social and Emotional Intelligence,?and the founder of People Builders.
Visit www.grantherbert.com to find out how you can connect.
HR Manager at LinkedVA
1 年Reading your story, Grant, made me reflect on my own journey. It's comforting to know that I'm not alone in wrestling with the internal conflicts and doubts. Your openness creates a sense of connection and understanding.
Radiation Electronics CTO, just Retired
1 年Like Lenin
Realtor Associate @ Next Trend Realty LLC | HAR REALTOR, IRS Tax Preparer
1 年Thanks for Sharing.