Take Pride In Your Scars

I have never known anyone who has gone through life unscathed. Take pride in your scars, they are a part of your life story. I've held on to that philosophy for many years. I have many scars and defects. There have been times that others have asked me to change or cover up some of them. As a child, that hurt. As an adult, there are times it still stings. Most of the time, these days, I take pride in my scars and my life story.?

I usually don't share this type of personal information. I've decided it might help someone else. If it does, then it's worth a few moments of discomfort on my part.?

I was born with a heart defect. As a result, I had open heart surgery. This left me with a large scar from the center of my chest, around my left side to my spine. My shoulders were also off balance, one would hang lower than the other. When I was a kid, there were times I would take off my shirt and play around the neighborhood just like many other boys my age. There were a couple of times, someone would ask me to put my shirt on, to cover up my scar.?

I was also born with a cataract which left me blind in my right eye. Due to the lack of vision, that eye has nothing to focus on and has a tendency to turn in a bit.?

Growing up, I became very aware that I looked different that other kids. That always settled in the back of my mind. Yet, it never held me back. Even though I was a scrawny little kid. I played little league baseball, middle school football, high school basketball, ran track and was on the cross-country team.?

I didn't let my rough start in life hold me back. I was fortunate to grow up in a small Kansas town, where people encouraged kids to grow and flourish.?

When I was in middle school and high school, I learned to carry heavy objects in my left hand to help even out my shoulders. Over time, they have gotten much better, less noticeable.?

I am right handed. Growing up in a rural area I learned to hunt and fish. I was taught to shoot a gun, shoot a bow with my left hand and my good left eye.?

I always learned to adapt and not concern myself with anything that others might consider as obstacles.?

Now that I'm in my late 50's and have spent most of my career in public service, I've forgotten about most of my scars and flaws. Except for the one I see in the mirror every day. Earlier this year I went to an eye specialist to talk about alignment correction, to straighten my right eye and make it less noticeable that I'm blind in one eye. I do have some peripheral vision in that eye and straightening it would help with some with my peripheral vision.?

I had a consultation with the eye specialist. She kept saying the procedure was "cosmetic" but it would be a simple process. The next words she said, hit me hard. She told me, my appearance has probably held me back my entire life. It was probably holding me back from making more money. After that she handed me release forms for the surgery and thanked me for stopping in to see her.?

When I got back to my car, I was still feeling the shock of what she had said to me in that 5 minute conversation. It stung the same way it did, as a child, when I was asked to put my shirt on to cover my scar. Driving home, I decided, she would not be operating on me.?

Then I wrestled with the thought of whether I had let my scars and flaws hold me back all these years. I shared this news with my siblings. My oldest brother asked if I had ever heard of Mo Udall. I had not but Wikipedia is my friend. Morris "Mo" Udall was an attorney who turned politician and served as a U.S. Representative from Arizona from 1961 to 1991.?

Mo Udall lost one eye as a child, in an accident. He went on to become a great athlete. He served in the military, became an attorney and served his country as a political leader. He did not let his loss of an eye hold him back.?He did not let it define him.

I feel that I've done OK in my lifetime as a husband, a father, a journalist, an Economic Development Director, a City Administrator and now Executive Director of the Information Network of Kansas.?I have done my best to be a dedicated public servant.

I want others to know the importance of ignoring those who think you need to cover up your flaws. No instead, take pride in your scars. They are a part of your life story. They are part of who you are today.