?? ??-???????? ?????????????? ?????? ???????????? ???????????????? ???? ????????

A few years ago, I was in Los Angeles, CA, with my friend Shaye. We had been in meetings all day and she suggested that we should go relax with a drink and a steak. Just say “steak” to this descendant of a nd?r?b?, and you are guaranteed a willing participant. So, we jumped into a taxi and headed into the bustling part of the city. Little did I know that Shaye had bigger plans up her sleeve.

At the time, we were both directors at the same organization, but leading different teams. Our roles were client facing which meant that we always had to be very well put together; from head to toe. Now, I had this wig that I had been rocking for a few months and I really thought I looked the part of “Director,” in this thing.

“Tab…” Shaye began with a certain seriousness that was not appropriate after having two glasses of wine. She proceeded to give me constructive feedback about my look. In particular, about my wig and my weave decisions over our past few meetings. You all don’t need the details of what she said. haha. However, from her critical feedback, I knew why my look was not working, how my bad wig/weave behaviors would sabotage my career trajectory, and exactly what I needed to do, to “come correct,” with my look.

???? ?????? ?????? ?????????? ???????? ???? ???????????? ???????? ?? ???????????????? ?????????? ?????????????? ???????????????? ???? ??????????????? She inadvertently used the 5 Step Process I am about to show you. A method that will help you give corrective feedback to your team in a manner that is clear, direct, kind and effective.

???????? ?????? ?????? ???????? ????????????, ???????? ???????? ???????? ???? ?????????????????? ???? ???????? ?????????? ?????????????????? and will actually take the action you need them to take. No more having to talk about the same issues over and over again.

???? ?????? ??????, ???????? ???? ?????? ???? ???????????????????? ???? ????????. ?????????? ???? ?????????????? ?????????? ???????? ???????? ???? ????????????. ?? ???????? ????????’?? '???????????? ??????????????' ???????? ????????.

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The process was first outlined by the Center of Creative Leadership as SBI, a 3 step process. I added 2 more steps from my own experience.

???????? ???????????????? ??????????????

1?? ???????? ??- ??????????????????: This is about giving the recipient a reference point or context of the feedback by defining the specific and precise situation you are referring to. Avoid vague terms like, “the other day,” or “You always.”

?????????????? - "On Monday’s team meeting, when you gave your presentation,“ Or “On the Sales report that you sent me last Wednesday,” Or “On the client call that you took on Friday afternoon.”

2?? ???????? ?? - ????????????????: This is where you discuss the exact behavior you want them to address. Focus on facts without layering on subjective judgements as this would create defensiveness. For example, “You were sloppy,” is a subjective judgement verses, “Your work had a lot of errors is a fact.”

?????????????? ??????????????????: “During yesterday morning's team meeting, when you gave your presentation, (??????????????????) you were uncertain about two of the slides and your sales calculations were incorrect.“ (????????????????)

3?? ???????? ?? - ????????????: This is where you highlight the impact of the person's behavior on you, the team and or the organization. Use “I” or “we” to make the point because it makes the impact of their behavior, real.

?????????????? ?????????????????? - On Monday’s team meeting when you gave your presentation (??????????????????), you were uncertain about two of the slides and your sales calculations were incorrect. (????????????????) The entire executive team was present and I was concerned that this affected the reputation of our team. (????????????.)

4?? ???????? ??- ??????????: This is where you pause to allow the recipient to process what you said and respond. From their response, you may uncover the problem’s real root cause.

5?? ???????? ??: ??????????????: This is where you explore a specific solution, together. Avoid telling them what to do, unless this has been a repetitive problem. Ask "Who" “How", "What," "When" "Why" questions.

?????????????? ?????????????????? - On Monday’s team meeting when you gave your presentation (??????????????????), you were uncertain about two of the slides and your sales calculations were incorrect. (????????????????) The entire executive team was present and I was concerned that this affected the reputation of our team. (????????????.) PAUSE. “How can I help you ensure that future presentations contain accurate information?” (??????????????)

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This simple formula has worked for all levels, from executives to individual contributors. It allows you to give radically candid feedback because it innately demonstrates that you care and challenges directly as well.

?? Genius is simple. Genius is repeatable and repetition creates mastery.

Use this formula the next time you have to give constructive feedback and you will see your difficult conversations go with ease, you will not ruin relationships and you will see your team make the corrective action you need them to.

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?? Drop a note if you learnt something from this post!

References: Center For Creative Leadership & Mindtools.