Swiss Singles Who Are Successfully Dating Are Doing These 5 Things Before First Dates

Dating should be a fun process, right? You get to have interesting conversations with new singles in new places. But… getting back into dating, especially after not having dated in a while, can feel daunting and overwhelming.

You want to start dating again but have doubts and concerns about how to start? Learn the 5 things Swiss singles I work with do before first dates that brings them success.

Number one dating mistake single women make

If it’s been a while since your last relationship or haven’t dated in a while, it’s easy to feel like you’re ‘‘behind,” don’t have the right tools, or that the relationship tools you have are ‘‘rusty.’’

A big mistake I see Swiss singles, especially women make when they reenter the dating pool is to show up reserved and unwilling to be their authentic self. And often they don’t realize they’re doing this! They may feel like they’re being cautious to avoid getting hurt but this actually works against them.

Just think about how unlikely it is for a date to go well for someone like that. If you only give your date 65%, how can you expect him to show up fully? If you don’t show the best version of your authentic self and the positive parts of your personality until you get to know the other person, how can you expect the other person to show theirs? Showing up with this attitude is a surefire way to lose out on the chance for a second date.

Be yourself on the first date

The solution? Be your true authentic self from the start. Don’t put up a wall and think, “Let me first see what they’re like.” This is a self protection mechanism based on the fear that you may get hurt.

“Before I let someone in, I want to get to know them better.”

You think you're protecting yourself but this has the reverse effect, no one will want to come in if you keep everyone out.

You need to be open and vulnerable and approach each new person with a clean slate. Wouldn’t you want the same in return?

There’s good news though! There are things you can do that will help you feel more prepared and at ease to start dating again with confidence. When you feel prepared and confident you’ll go into dates feeling more natural and much more likely to be yourself and create a positive connection. Take out the guesswork and set yourself up for success with these five tips.

5 dating tips Swiss singles use in dating

Here are 5 things you can do today to make your next first date a breeze! My?single Swiss clients have used these?and returned to me saying they enjoyed their first dates and it helped them move the connection forward.

1. Have 1-2 outfits prepared for spontaneous dates

Pick out outfits that you feel comfortable and attractive in, both walking around and sitting down to dinner. Take a picture of yourself in them and send to friends to get feedback. Trust their opinion but make your personal comfort a priority. You should feel comfortable as well as attractive in your dating outfits.

Next time you have the opportunity for an unexpected or spontaneous meetup, you can focus on the excitement for it instead of a sense of panic about what to wear.

2. Go on a mock date with a friend

Practice some easy conversation topics.?They help you to get things going. Notice what you can easily talk about and what leads to dead ends.?

Practice asking thoughtful questions.?Focus on ‘‘why’s’’ instead of ‘‘what’s’’ to avoid monotony. Instead of only asking, ‘‘What did you study at university?’’ try asking, ‘‘Why did you choose to study what you did at university?’’ It will make for much more engaging conversation.

Practice your flirting skills.?Ask your friend how you come across, especially regarding your body language. Sometimes we close ourselves off without realizing it and need someone else to give us that feedback.

3. Be prepared and arrive on time

Arriving on time is important out of respect for the other person. Being late is a first indication that the date is not important to you, and is simply bad manners. And showing up rushed and talking about traffic, missed turns, trouble finding parking etc. adds a frenetic energy to the date. You want to start out on an all around positive note.

If you tend to have dietary restrictions or are just the kind of person who takes a long time to order, try looking up the menu ahead of time and have two or three options prepared. You can even ask your date, “I can’t decide between the salmon and the chicken, they both look delicious, which would you choose?”

4. Get in the right mood

Don’t rush straight from a board meeting. Unwind a bit and allow yourself to get in the mood. Get into your feminine energy so you can show up a warm, soft, friendly and open version of yourself.

Do something you enjoy before the date. If possible make the last thing you work on at work that day something you enjoy, stack all the positive energy you can so you go into the date ready to build off of this.

Act enthusiastic and you will be enthusiastic.

When you first see your date, greet them warmly and enthusiastically to ease tension. Make an effort to give a big smile and a warm greeting, “Hey, I’m so happy to meet you!” to start the date off on good foot and let them know that you are excited to be there.

5. Act like you already know and like them

Before going on a date, think about three things you already know and like about the new person and prepare to then look immediately for three new things you like about them such as: a wonderful smile, kind eyes, great hair, nice style, etc.

This is to counterbalance the holding back that can naturally happen when you first meet someone you don’t know. This can also help you feel empowered and realize the power you possess to influence how successful the date is.

Sometimes I’ll hear that, ‘‘The guy didn’t do or say anything that could spark an interest…’’ To which I always ask, ”What did YOU do or say to spark his interest?” We naturally like people who we feel might like us. It is important to show the other person this. Remember: you get what you give.

Always look for the good in others. Focus on that, versus one thing you don’t like right away. Not “Oh, he’s shorter than I thought” but, ‘‘He has a much nicer smile than I realized.’’ Give clear affirmations and appreciations and point out the things you have in common and verbalize your delight. This will put you both in the best position possible to make a connection.

How working with a dating coach helps Swiss singles succeed

If you’re reading this and thinking “it’s not anything I didn’t know before”, ask yourself how often you have used these tips on your dates”. Successful partner search is not about knowing – it’s about doing the things that help you get to that second date and finally find the right life partner.

Working with a dating coach makes a huge difference, I know it from my Swiss single clients whom I guide in private coaching, group programs and workshops. They get the motivation to implement those tried and tested tips and really make it work.

I hope these tips will help you have enjoyable and successful dates! If you are ready to find the love of your life but want to have the expert support and guidance of an award winning matchmaker and coach then?contact me for a complimentary consultation.