Susan Cain & Daniel Pink: Writing, Longing, and the Search for Meaning

I’ve been thinking lately about the song "Smile," written by Charlie Chaplin (of all people) and made famous by Nat King Cole.

Smile though your heart is aching ?? Smile even though it’s breaking ???When there are clouds in the sky, you’ll get by …

It kind of sums up the prototypical American approach to hardship, doesn’t it? This is what Susan Cain calls our “culture of normative sunshine.”

And yet — with no disrespect to Charlie and Nat — I can’t help but wonder: Has that compulsory cheer always served us? Sometimes when our hearts ache, isn’t it okay to just let them ache? Listen to the song on repeat, as I’ve been doing lately, and you realize that what makes it so marvelous isn’t the message of hope; it’s the *longing* in Nat’s voice, the way he sings like a man who can’t banish his despair.

After a few plays, I found myself asking: What do we lose when we avoid sorrow and chase empty delights, when we mask our pain by performing optimism, when we profess to have no regrets and insist on turning every frown upside down?

I’m not alone in wondering these things. They’ve been top of mind for two of my favorite people — two people who also happen to be curators here at the Next Big Idea — Susan Cain and Daniel Pink. In their new books — Susan’s is called Bittersweet, Dan’s is The Power of Regret — they give the negative emotions sorrow, longing, and regret their beautiful due.

My colleagues and I loved these books so much we sent signed copies to everyone with a Next Big Idea Club hardback subscription. And over the next few weeks, Susan and Dan are going to be doing some extraordinary things for ALL of our club members — participating in exclusive Q&As, creating e-courses — and on top of all that, they were kind enough to carve out time to join me on the show today.

Every week I get to talk with brilliant people on this podcast, but I don’t often get them to talk with each other. That’s one of the reasons the conversation you’re about to hear is so special. Susan and Dan swap notes on the writing process, share what they’ve learned from each other, and imagine a future where instead of disparaging negative emotions we embrace them.

Episode Notes

?? Check out our previous interviews with Susan and Dan

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?? Grab a copy of Bittersweet

?? Grab a copy of The Power of Regret