Surviving Your First Post-College Job

This week marks my 30-year anniversary of moving to New York City to start my first post-college job in my chosen career field. I was so excited to finally get started on the “rest of my life” but I was also incredibly nervous. After all, living and working in NYC had been my lifelong dream. Working in a top ad agency was dream #2. I fantasized about all the great things I would do, the awesome ideas I would produce, and how rapidly I would move up the corporate ladder. Basically, I wanted to be able to support myself and prove that I could make it on my own -- in New York City no less. I was really eager to make my mark and put my education to work. Inside, I was really worried about whether I was capable enough, and I was petrified of failing. Bottom line, I wanted to be a success.

I was totally unprepared for the rude awakening that awaited me. First, I couldn’t afford to rent an apartment in Manhattan unless I was willing to live with 5 other people in a tiny two -bedroom apartment north of Central Park. Instead, I opted to move into a house with one available bedroom above a doctor’s office in Moonachie, NJ, - along with three other complete strangers.

Second, my first day on the job was beyond brutal! I was in a national television media buying department and the annual, upfront market place broke wide open. It was a frenzied competition for the best commercial inventory, in the best programs on television, for the best price.  Negotiations were on-going, and those of us not wheeling and dealing on the phones were frantically crunching numbers for our teams to determine if the current deal offered was good or not. This was not the electronic age, so financial analyses were done the “old way” with pencils, paper, and big-ass calculators. It was mayhem. It was crazy, but it was fun. My first day on the job, no one left the office until 4:00 am. 

I was really motivated to do well, so, I worked the extra hours without complaint. That first week I never left the office before 2 am, and still showed up the following morning no later than 8:30. Things eased up a bit as the upfront finished, but I never left the office before 9pm, and life continued that way. As a result, my only friends were my co-workers. My entire social life -- life -- revolved around work. The only support system I had were the people I worked with since we were all in the same boat. If we weren’t at work, we were talking about it. Needless to say, my college boyfriend (who wasn’t in the ad buying business) didn’t put up with this for long and we broke up.  

Life took on a steady cadence. I worked, ate, slept, paid bills. Repeat. But all was not well. Despite the hours, dedication, and personal sacrifices, I was not a raging success. I was doing “all the things,” but it was so boring. It’s hard to get passionate about grunt work and long hours even when you know it’s part of paying your dues. I started to question if my lifelong dream was really what I wanted after all. While my self-reflection and lack of interest may have been noticeable, it wouldn’t have changed the outcome of that first job for me. Simply put, my boss hated me and made my transition to adulting so much harder. Her insecurities made her unwilling to teach, explain things, include me or my co-workers in meetings, or even share the candy our client brought for the entire team. She withheld key information and documents I needed to do my job and would stare at me wordlessly when I would finally summon up the courage to ask her a question.  I was told not to worry about it because she was like that with everyone. Yeah, right. When review time came, she sat me down and gave me the worst review I have ever had (still) in my entire career. She literally ended it with, “You will never have a career in media. Look for a job in another industry.”  I. Was. Devastated. She wanted me to sign the review to make it official, accepted and done. But something deep inside me just wouldn’t and couldn’t accept what she had said. Who was she to make a pronouncement like that and effectively impact the rest of my life? Despite being in complete shock, I said I needed to think about it, took my crappy review and walked out of her office. The first thing I did was call my mom. I thought I would cry but as I relayed the news to her, I got more and more pissed. The second action I took was booking an appointment to see the head of the department (my boss’ boss). The bottom line was that the review was bogus and I refused to sign it. The late, Bill Croasdale was the head of our department at the time and a good leader. He listened empathetically, asked me a few questions, then took out a blank review form and proceeded to write out his own performance evaluation for me. That’s the one I signed. 

Shortly after that, I took my third step by pitching a job opening on someone else’s team. I really wanted to quit, but I had only been working 6 months and had neither the savings nor enough practical experience to just leave to find another job. I knew this other woman was known for being a complete tyrant, but I figured things couldn’t get much worse. I also knew that while she had zero patience when it came to getting things done, she believed in investing time (and patience) into teaching her staff how to do things right – and learning was what I wanted most. My plan was to learn as much as possible then find a better-paying job at another agency. My transfer was approved and for the next six months, I worked my ass off for a woman who ranted and raved, hovered over me while I worked, made me re-do everything by hand several times over and gave me an eye twitch that lasted for 5 of those 6 months.  I went from being persona non grata to living under a microscope, but OMG did I LEARN! First, I learned that someone else’s bad experience with one individual or company doesn’t necessarily mean it will be my experience. Second, I learned the media industry from a macro and micro level. My boss’ baptism-by-fire approach was not one I would willingly repeat for myself or others, but it gave me a rock-solid foundation in media math, inventory management, negotiation, revenue & yield management, pricing, and writing. (Did I mention she was a former English teacher?) I could have continued working for her because we actually got along really well, but the stress-induced eye twitch HAD TO GO. I also needed to branch out, meet more people in my industry and basically get a life. I had learned so much about the job and myself, that I felt much more confident and convinced that I could continue my media career successfully without sacrificing so much of my time and self. 

My first job experience taught me a lot. Some of what I learned can be boiled down into the following 10 tips on how to adjust to life in your first job post-college:

1.     Be clear on who you are, and what you stand for (at least with yourself)

2.     Know what you want.

3.     Create a life for yourself outside of work – different venues and different friends that are not related to work.

4.     Compartmentalize – a part two to number 3, keep your work life separate and your private life private, and give serious consideration to what, how, and how much you share on social media from both worlds.

5.     Keep learning, and recognize that learning comes in different forms and from people we would least suspect to have something to teach us.

6.     List out your accomplishments somewhere for just you to see, so when you have self-doubt or flagging confidence, you can read it to remind yourself how awesome you are.

7.     Stand up for yourself. Do not let anyone define you, put you in a box, or in any way label you.

8.     Learn how to make a personal budget and stick to it. Include saving money for a rainy day. That way, if you find yourself in a bad work situation, you can leave it.

9.     Each week, document what you have accomplished in your job, and make a list of what top 2-5 things you will do the following week. Stick to the plan. This will come in handy later when you need to write your self-evaluation or ask for a raise or promotion.

10. Meet people and nurture your relationships with them even if all that means is a semi-annual email or phone call to catch up. Help people out and give back when and where you can. The result will be a genuine, reliable personal and professional network.

While not everyone has such a rough start in his/her first jobs out of college, the transition from student to employee (or entrepreneur) can be a huge shift in priorities, responsibilities, and perspective. Not everyone is blessed enough to have a good boss, mentor or support system to help navigate those shifts which is why blogs like TranZitions (Tranzitions.net) that I created with my daughter exist. It’s a means of reaching and helping as many young adults as possible. If others can benefit from our experiences, then we have been successful.