The surprising sting of grief at work

I started making myself a fruit salad this morning, and as I sliced up the pears and persimmons, a vivid memory popped to mind. Leila doing exactly that - we were on a project in India and stayed at a corporate apartment for a few months. Leila Janah was a young colleague and mentee who worked with me at Katzenbach Partners. While I would quickly shovel a mouthful of cereal into my mouth while checking emails, she would very mindfully prep a delicious meal of fruit for herself. We laughed at how different we were. Her precision and care, my energy and productivity. I remembered the moment with perfect clarity and felt a deep sadness. Leila succumbed to a rare form of cancer at 37 in 2020.?

My mind wandered to other colleagues and classmates lost along the way - a young engineering colleague who crashed while piloting a small plane with his buddies, another who succumbed to depression. The mind is a strange organ. It took me a while to get back to my calendar and focus on work today.

At 760K Covid deaths, we’re looking at almost as many families that are grieving. But let's spare a thought for the colleagues who remember the water cooler interaction that will not happen again with a lost colleague, the karaoke team dinners, the drives to client meetings, the ideation sessions, the working lunches to talk through different perspectives on the budget… We all carry a burden, so let’s make sure to be kind.

This hit too close to home for me this summer. Not Covid, but one may argue that Covid was one of the causes for what happened.

TOO MUCH INFO WARNING: I've had the summer from hell. I had "routine" surgery in June that turned out to be anything but routine. A nicked organ resulted in two more surgeries, quarantine, multiple transfusions, and two hospitalizations before becoming almost pain-free in late-September! A 3.5-month saga, and still looking to need some time to fully recuperate. Getting there… but I won’t forget the days when I would sit up and write letters - to my parents, kids, friends. The letters are hidden away now, but in them I shared how I hoped they would live full lives, hang tight to joy and hopefully remember me for what I tried to do.

The exhaustion remains, but I’m getting ready to pop back on the corporate horse! I am taking my time, not fretting. Watching ESG news and considering what the next step should be. I’m relishing being alive and surrounded by family and friends.?

Call me. Let’s just chat.

But also remember… Be kind. There is grief at large in the workplace - like never before.