The surprising gifts of being overwhelmed
If you are feeling overwhelmed right now you are probably thinking — are you kidding me? I totally understand! When I was overwhelmed, all I wanted to do was crawl into bed and hide from the world. It felt so debilitating.
But, looking back on overwhelming times for myself, I now see them as the best gift for me.
Here are a few reasons why:
> It forced me to prioritize myself.
I’m your textbook people pleaser. Earlier in my career I would work crazy long hours, I would cancel plans last minute for my boss, I’d go to that super inconvenient place to meet a friend, and I would take calls at all hours of the day and night.
When I got so overwhelmed that I couldn’t see straight and I wasn’t sure I could even make it into work, it made me realize I needed to change things up big time.
Since I was in survival mode, I no longer agreed to do the things that didn’t work for me, simply because I knew that if I did compromise something, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to make it through the week.
Now that I’m no longer overwhelmed, I have a much stronger muscle in prioritizing myself and setting the boundaries that I need to — and it’s made a huge difference. I can still produce the work that I want to, and give myself what I need to feel good and succeed.
> It forced me to delegate and be strategic with my time and work.
As part of my people-pleasing tendencies, I would usually take on more work than other people, and I always felt uncomfortable asking for help.
Once I was drowning in work and felt like I couldn’t breathe, I had no time for that. I joked with my friends that I felt like I spent most of my day thinking about how to not do work, but it was an essential switch that needed to happen. I needed to focus on empowering my team, rather than taking on everything myself — a natural shift that happens when you move from being a worker to a leader.
I’m grateful that I was overwhelmed because it’s likely I wouldn’t have learned so quickly how to delegate and be strategic about what needs to happen when.
> It forced me to not care as much
People pleasing meant that my self-worth was tied up in making other people happy. I always wanted to do the best job, have everything perfect, and ensure that my manager, team, and everyone around me loved me and got the results they needed exactly as they wanted it. It was exhausting!
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Being overwhelmed meant that I couldn’t care so much. By letting go of my perfection, I was able to focus on getting the best work done that needed to get done, and not trying to tailor everything to what someone else wanted.
> It forced me to stay out of the drama and politics
I had zero time and energy for this. I would literally walk out of rooms where any of this was happening. If someone engaged me in conversation about drama or politics, I would usually nod, maybe offer a “oh man!” and then quickly change the topic.
I had a limited amount of energy, and there was no way I was going to waste it on this.
Man, was that so freeing!
> It forced me to create an incredibly strong self-care practice
In my most recent period of being overwhelmed, I also had some health concerns as well (which looking back I’m sure were tied to the stress I was feeling). I really needed a lot of rest, and I did everything I possibly could to address these concerns. The result was a strong self-care practice that works really well for me now. I didn’t even know that being alone is a really important part of what fuels me. I always thought of myself as an extrovert, but when I didn’t have any alone time, I realized I really needed introverted, quiet time to be at my best.
>> My challenge to you:
I’d love to know if this helped you think of things differently, and helps you overcome overwhelm the next time the feeling creeps in.
Gaining clarity in your next steps is so valuable — my Career Change Clarity course is now a self-study version — take a look and see if it could help you.