Not Surprised

It is not surprising to me that change is hard for most people. Changes to how we gather for church and for schooling is hard. Changes to how we appear in public with a mask or shield is not comfortable or empowering. Changes to how we are limited in our entertainment options are a new experience and quite boring. Changes to how we do our work, gather with our team, and collect our checks have been devastating to companies, families, and individuals all over the world. I am not surprised that we are are tired, a little bit angry, and edging towards what feels like hopelessness. All of that/this is real and I think natural to the human experience when life is heavy. I am not surprised that due to our isolation we are turning to social media to vent and declare our personal positions. We are verbal creatures (some more than others) and just getting our thoughts out is a helpful exercise. I get it and I am not surprised.

What is surprising though is what people are saying, and more concerning, the spirit they display in posts and reposts. More than one respected friend and/or leader has spun a conspiracy theory with no evidence and no consideration for how they might confuse someone who follows them. More than one respected friend and/or leader has chosen to defend a position or politic that is self serving and not God exalting. More than one friend and/or respected leader has weighed in on subjects that they have very little insight about, but happened to watch a CNN/FOX news report and feels the need to set the record straight. More than one friend and/or respected leader has shared a post or story from another source without checking to see if it was truthful or without considering if it was a helpful thing to share. More than one friend and/or respected leader has chosen to debate people from afar without concern to the damage they are doing to a person's feelings or to the friendship. Most surprising to me though might be that many of my friends and respected leaders have remained silent when people who would listen to them are setting the internet on fire with lies, conspiracies, fear mongering, fake news, etc...

To steal a government phrase from a previous crisis we survived - "If you see something, say something." Let that be true of those we know who are knowingly or unknowingly causing problems in the social community and in our own circle of friends and family. My wife would say that we are to call them out carefully and kindly in order to see change. I think she is right, but I am tempted by a different method. We do not say "shut up" around our house/family, but I think that would be great advice for many of the things I am seeing and reading from friends and family. In the end, friends should not let friends "drink and drive" nor should we let friends "Lie and Deceive" themselves and/or others.

Here is the formula to follow in "saying something." It is a bit long, so get a pencil and write it down (or tattooed if that’s your thing.) Test it out. Practice it regularly. Make the effort. Take the risk because being quiet and being content in this matter is also being complicit in the pain it causes others.

Truth + Courage + (Right)Temperament + Love + Listening + Time + Fairness + Hope = Growth, Healing, Unity and Progress

That formula will be helpful for the pandemic. It will work in our discussions about racial injustice. It adds up in our coming political war. It will work without about anything that divides one man/women from another woman/man over an issue. We just have to make an attempt to create healthy spaces for living and leading which must be truth based and compassionately driven.

I am not surprised that we are having problems with each other. It is not even a surprise to me that we are digging lines in the dirt and building walls to keep sides separate. I am only surprised that we aren't that upset about it and that it is growing in our persona. No, that is not just surprising to me. It is disheartening and it does not have to be that/this way. You/ I can be the change.

I am not ready to give up yet. Are you?