Not Sure What to Change in Your Life? Try This Negative Life Audit

From time to time, it's healthy to take stock of where you're at in life. Doing some kind of life audit -- usually through a questionnaire of some kind -- can be helpful to achieve that goal. Most of the life audits you'll find are positive in nature or reflect assumptions about what is good or valuable, such as asking if you're participating in enjoyable activities or have good friends. They generally answer the question, "How many steps have I finished so far on the journey to the finish line?" I've written those kinds of audits in the past, and they've been widely read.

But if you know me personally or from reading my work, you know I'm a pretty hard critic. But I'm a hopeful critic. I revel in picking out the negative, not because I'm some kind of masochist or want to hurt others, but rather because I understand that success and satisfaction is as much about tackling and fixing existing problems as it is setting good, motivational targets. I firmly believe you have to see and acknowledge a problem before you can fix it. I'm yelling a hard "I'm done" when it comes to brushing uncomfortable things under the rug, because I don't want to be bound by those uncomfortable things.

So, when it comes to a life audit, doesn't it make sense that, if you do one that intentionally takes a negative angle (i.e., one that asks, "What's keeping me from the finish line?" or "Where have I gone wrong on the journey to the finish line?"), you'd have a better understanding of what you need to change or improve?

Put another way, I want you to have a life audit that forces you to face what you have to address if you want a better life. The gaps. The faults. The mistakes. You can correct all of those, if you know and admit what they are.

1. What habits or financial/character liabilities need to go that are still interfering with my life goals?
2. Who around me haven't I helped yet?
3. Where am I lacking in education or skill?
4. Where/how could I be deeper, more empathetic, or more consistent in my communication?
5. What's limiting me from having sufficient free time?
6. Am I doing anything that's potentially (or already) damaging my physical health?
7. If I don't feel satisfied in my time alone or doing hobbies, why?
8. What makes handling my emotions difficult right now?
9. Where do I feel the most tempted to hold back expression, and if I can name it/them, what specific feeling(s) do I most commonly not release?
10. What haven't I been able to do because of a lack of money or other support?
11. Are there people I meant to reach out to but never did (including celebrities, dream mentors, etc.)?
12. On what issues or topics haven't I been fully understood? Why?
13. What opportunities do I regret not taking? Why?
14. In what areas do I consistently lack confidence or independence?
15. What has negatively influenced my sense of self or worth?
16. What potential resource options do I still need to look into?
17. What don't I have that would enable me to better lead myself or others?
18. What's not realistic about the dreams I have (i.e., where am I not well grounded)?
19. What bucket list places haven't I visited?
20. What's uncomfortable in my current environment?
21. Have any of my relationships failed or been toxic? Why?
22. What am I afraid of?
23. What's in my life that consistently drains my energy or joy?
24. In what ways haven't I been kind to myself or others?
25. In what ways does my work deviate from my values or vision?
26. What are the top five problems I see with myself?
27. What grudges am I still holding (i.e., where do I still need to offer forgiveness)?
28. In what ways have I minimized or hidden my skills, talents, or best character attributes?
29. What do I feel jealous or envious about?
30. What interests do I have that I haven't explored?
31. What haven't I delegated that doesn't have to be on my plate?
32. What negative situations have I gotten yourself into and how/why?
33. What losses have occurred that are influencing me?
34. What obstacles do I find myself running into over and over again?

Remember, the point of this negative audit isn't to ruminate on what sucks or hasn't been done to the point of despair. As a Christian, I believe it's important to follow the advice of Philippians 4:8: "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things."

The point is to think about what is good but to admit to yourself what's holding you back from achieving, accepting, or enjoying those good things. If you can make that kind of admission and identify the true root cause of the trouble, you arm yourself with a specific list of items you have the power to take action on.

And when you take action, life changes.

Like this content?

• Subscribe to Wanda Thibodeaux's LinkedIn Mind Uncensored newsletter.
• Follow Wanda Thibodeaux and read her independent work on Medium.