SUMAN @ 18- THE REBEL

Each one of us are a unique creation of God and we all know that no two people are alike. Similarly life cannot be the same for everyone. All of us have our own share of the good, bad and ugly.

People usually think that confidence is an outcome of a comfortable environment. Well, in most cases it is not, and the same goes for me. I’ve struggled my way up, learnt to survive and live on my own terms.

Coming from a joint Punjabi family, every single soul in my house was SUPER conservative except my mother who was a modern lady from the 70s.

I was the first child of the family and as we all know that with all the pampering, the first child usually gets screwed with the burden of expectations. I wasn’t spared either; a consolidated dream of the entire family, that emerged from my father’s unreasonable emotion was to see me as a doctor, just because Bua’s (Aunt’s) son, some distant cousin and neighbour’s niece was a doctor.

My father was an over-protective parent like my other uncles however, his expression of love was in extreme and he left no stone unturned to don a Hitler’s hat. A controlling father and to complement that a stubborn daughter, I always had a personality clash with him. From a very early age I got immune to the rules and regulations of the society and grew up to be a complete rebel.

I clearly remember those early teenage days when my dad expressed his desire to see me wearing only salwar kurta (Indian attire) and no westerns, it came to me as the biggest culture shock of my life as I was on a completely different trip. I was quite a Tom-boy with one ear pierced, had short hair and to add to this I was a blind follower of George Micheal. My dad and me were poles apart.

Somewhere in my heart I knew that I was not a typical delicate shy girl who would live a normal life like all the other girls or women in my family including my very own sister and I always thought that by design there was a fault in me that I am different .... or rather weird.

I never felt the need to have friends outside as I had a full house- my own siblings and cousins, hence I was not a social animal but surely loved developing my exploratory skills being a typical curious teenager.

I was academically challenged especially when Maths became Algebra and Geometry and Science became Physics, Chemistry and Biology, my interest in studies deteriorated. I am a visual learner and my right brain is far more active than my left brain which I discovered many years ago. I was not at all cut out for academics and by God’s grace I never went to college to waste my time. I have always believed that qualifications are meant for those who wish to pursue a specific career that requires you to study technical subjects like medical, engineering, law, etc. I was not made for any of these professions and therefore there was no point pursuing something just for the sake of it, unlike many people in India who collect degrees just to secure their future - an incorrect thought process that attributes to false belief – RUBBISH.

I guess the reason for my independent thinking is that I never came under the pressure of society and always followed my intuition.

On my 18th birthday, I left my home and I have been on my own since then. Seen many different shades of life, ups and downs and every shade has been an enriching experience. My journey this far has taught me how to be responsible, sensible and sensitive to feelings and relationships.

I laugh in my head when I think of my very first job where I was given a responsibility to handle school administration at the age of 19, I resigned from the job after two day because I had to wake up early at 7am and report for work by 8:15am.

It’s always good to look back and evaluate your progress in all aspects and find a good enough reason to pat your own back once in a while :)

I’ve realised that to succeed in life there are no different rules, all you need is to be the best in what you do, I did just the same and still striving for excellence. Follow your dreams and success will follow. I don’t bag fancy qualifications at the chip of my shoulder but I’ve always been the best at what I do. Likewise everyone has a spark, a magic that lies within all of us but many fail to discover as we get succumbed to the day to day worldly pressures and forget to listen to our heart. There are no rat races and no competitions if you know where you have to go and you consistently follow the route without loosing your focus.

There are set norms for life. Just live, laugh and let things come your way. No one can plan a life perfectly and live accordingly.

Some lessons in life are learnt after making mistakes but never mind; As long as you are able to reverse them in the same life-time, it’s perfectly ok. 

I am on best terms with my dad and if one thinks in retrospect, we would realise that whatever happens, it is in the best of our interest. Had I not been a rebel, I wouldn’t have reached here and would have remained just another ordinary woman lost in the day to day rut blaming my destiny. My strong and outgoing personality is a gift from my father and we are both self-made head strong, yet extremely caring people.

Some principles that I follow in life:

1.    Love your family selflessly

2.    Try as much not to harm anyone’s interest if they are not at fault

3.    Keep the rebel inside you alive, it helps you bring out the feelings that are suppressed within the subconscious mind

4.    Self discovery is a must, know yourself completely before trying to learn about others

5.    Prioritise your health and fitness, you can’t fill anyone’s cup if your own cup is empty

6.    Being happy should be a conscious choice

7.    Balance your life, work and relationships

8.    Think in retrospect before loosing your mind, certain things are planned for the better

9.    Talk to your heart and follow your intuition, it will never misguide you

10. Chill....... life is too short to be grumpy :)

Cheers !!