Suicide Among Students: It's Too Late Not to React; Take Steps Now.

Yesterday again, one beautiful soul took an extreme step in Kota. Whenever we hear news of young kids taking this extreme step of giving away their life, we feel bad, and then life moves on. This is not a random act; it happens all around us. It's just that we choose to close our eyes. Our kids, our relatives and neighbors' kids are all going through this stress. It's high time that we come out of our comfort zone and do something about it. Somehow, I feel parents are the major reason for suicides among students, and they should start listening to their kids.

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??What leads to such extreme steps by kids??

? Thinking of parents that there is no need of giving time to kids, just give them money and resources ??, and their parental duty is done.

? Direct or indirect pressure from parents to do well in academics ??. Many parents say that they never put pressure on kids, but they forget that most of the time it's not direct words but subtle hints like body language or indirect references.

? In Society, success is often measured in direct relation to one's pay or job title ????, while intelligence is frequently linked to academic performance ???? or position in rank.

? Too much competition among students leads to pressure that others know more than me ??, and I may not be able to clear the exams.

? In top coaching institutes, many students come from small villages with poor financial backgrounds ??. It adds to the adjustment disorder to new environment.

? Fear of failure ??: What if I haven't cleared the exam? My parents will be disappointed. How will I end up having a good job or becoming the breadwinner for the family?

? Students coming from poor financial backgrounds witness their parents struggle and sacrifices for their education. Underperforming in academics adds pressure on students to prove that they are not giving enough effort ??.

? For many students, it is the first time they are away from their families. They were in a protective environment, and suddenly they are on their own. Ragging or teasing has a multifaceted impact on these children ????.

? The true culprits here are mobile phones ??. Excessive use is too distracting and affects concentration ????. Students often prioritize making TikTok videos and playing video games ?? over their studies. One side effect of using social media is cyberbullying, which affects mental health.

? Some students, under pressure, succumb to substance abuse ????, which ultimately leads to the extreme step.

? Lack of friends or someone to talk to due to the highly competitive environment ??. Peers are competitors, not friends. It leads to loneliness??.

? Many times, loneliness and pressure lead to involvement in immature relationships ????. They do not have emotional maturity to handle complex relationships and when these fail, tragically leads to suicide ??.

? Many students develop mental health issues because of any of the reasons stated above ??. They feel it is a stigma to seek help??. And these piled up emotions ends up in suicide??.

???What To Do as Parents, Teachers and Guardians -

?? Parents must realize that kids are not their property, and they should not force their dreams on them. If parents were not able to fulfil their dreams, then it was their incompetence, not the kids. Also, kids are not projects to be completed. You don't own them; your duty is to let them flourish the way they want, not what you feel is right. Let them have their own definition of success or happiness. ????

? Parents should teach kids that the actual success lies in living a happy and beautiful life irrespective of financial wealth or job titles. These are merely instruments to enhance one’s well-being. ????

? Teach them spirituality, as God is the best psychiatrist. ??

? Make it compulsory for kids to go out and play or walk for a minimum of 45 minutes every day. Teach kids that video games are not part of sports. ??

? Don't run behind 100% attendance in school. Take kids on vacations, send them to stay with relatives, and do activities with them. ???

? Kids should not feel that less marks or attendance is the end of their world. Teach them that failure is a part of life but it's not ok to give up. Encourage them self-reflection and introspection as valuable learning experiences. ??

? Parents give mobiles to kids to lessen their guilt and they understand that when a child is occupied, it gives them more time for their own mobile devices or personal pursuits. Restrict access to mobile and social media from the outset as once children become habitual to them, you cannot take it away easily afterwards. ????

? Don't skip school for tuition and coaching. Coaching is a highly competitive environment where kids see others as competitors and not as friends. Moreover, their social skills also hamper. ????

? Lead by example instead of issuing orders or commands. You can't expect your kid to go for a walk if you yourself are overweight or don't engage in physical activity. Don't order; engage in activities together. Basically, be a role model for your kids. ????

? Teach them yoga and meditation rather than trendy things that are commonly done, like learning foreign languages. These mindfulness techniques will remain with them forever and help them concentrate on their studies.

? Allow them to make their own choices. Sometimes kids follow a particular path because of their friends. As a parent, your job is to show them the many paths available, the pros and cons of each path, and use resources like sending them to a career counsellor. ???

Also, tell them if you want to choose a particular path now, then do so, but any day if you feel like changing the path, please do that. Don't feel ashamed of that, as it is good to learn, grow, and explore different avenues. ??

? Tell kids that school marks carry some value now, such as securing admission to reputable institutions, but in the future, marks will hold less weight, and what truly matters are your performance, decision-making abilities, emotional intelligence, and teamwork skills. ??

? Tell them that prestigious colleges, institutes, and marks help you launch one’s career; after 4-5 years of service, it doesn't matter. I have seen an engineer earn more than an IITian. Make kids smart, sincere, and a commitment to continuous learning. Teach them that whatever they do, they should do it in the best possible manner. ????

? Mandatory seven-day training on mental health for all educators, including those in tuition, coaching, school, and college. ??

? Additionally, allocate one day or multiple sessions for students on mental health awareness, empowering them to recognize signs in their peers and report concerns to teachers. ?????

? Spend time with kids and communicate with them. Talk to them about relationships, the dangers of drug use, body shaming, and using mobile to further studies, not as a distraction. Encourage kids to openly communicate with you; there is no need to hide from parents; talk openly, promote candid discussions. ????

????? Tell Tale Signs of Depression:

??Frequent mood changes; short temper, talking rudely to elders. ?????

??A sense of despair or hopelessness; talking negatively about everything. May be even fixating on the ceiling or any object for a long time. ??

??Isolation or limiting oneself to a room; not going to play or meet friends. ??

??Either no sleep or too much sleep. ??

??Substance abuse. ????

??Self-harming behavior, displaying a lack of concern for one's well-being such as safety like rash driving, not taking meds. ????

??Sudden change in hygiene behavior, like previously staying clean, now suddenly shabby. ??

??Not showing interest in one's passion. ??

??Sudden decline in academic performance. ??

??Binge eating or not interested in food at all. Therefore, look for sudden weight gain or weight loss. ??

?If one can observe a combination of some of these points and once, we see a red flag, then it is time for parents and teachers to take the necessary steps.