SUCCESS – A RESULT OF RELATIONSHIPS

“I am the sum total of everyone I’ve ever met,” said Sylvester Stallone in his speech after winning the Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actor in 2016. It’s an adage often heard or read in variation. We meet a variety of people through the journey of life and learn something from each one. Thus we are often advised to surround ourselves with good people. This does not necessarily mean we regulate who we interact with, but aim at building a good company around us over time. It may not only be a careful selection of people, but also a continuous effort to align and build capabilities and character of the group towards a common cause.

Our interactions and relationships with others significantly impact our lives and in some instances change the entire trajectory of life with respect to personal goals. At the core of this change is the flow of information between people. This exchange of information is not limited to the company one keeps but in todays age applies to the digital environment as well. In my previous article “A Day at a Time – My Advice to Youth”, I touched upon the subject of managing the information flow through this environment.

Prerequisite to managing information flow and its impact is self-awareness.

As Maslow’s hierarchy clearly defines, our needs evolve as we meet the objectives and desires across starting at the bottom and moving upwards eventually reaching self-actualization. At every point however, it is imperative to have clarity of objectives and then build appropriate capabilities to achieve them. Since we do not exist in isolation and progress or failure is a result of combined efforts, we need to ensure intellectual growth for not just ourselves but for the people around us as well. From a leader’s perspective, it is critical to create an environment that enables growth and allows people to learn and grow from and with each other. Relationships one shares are the resources that enable one to meet uncertainties faced in life. If the capabilities of these resources are not developed or utilized at the appropriate time, it inhibits our ability to move forward.

While one continues to evolve, learn and grow, be mindful of not burning any bridges. The relationships that helped you along the way must be respected and nurtured for continued growth. During my experiences, I have noticed situations where individuals, who witnessed rapid success, became self-centered and arrogance started creeping into their personality. Overconfidence increased the distance from people who were part to their entire journey that led them to success. Self-reflection, humility and due credit to people who enable your success become key at this point, even if the equation of the relationship changes.

A key element in the pool of relationships and information is the input from your critics. At an individual and an organizational level, it is important to ensure structured & unstructured mechanisms of acquiring feedback. If the culture of an organization is not built on the pillars of transparency, candor, harmony & collective wisdom, then a sustainable mechanism will not be set up and the organization will be at the mercy of an individual or few.

Fear of failure may inhibit the development of a culture where candor is promoted and openness is rewarded. In a ‘failure averse culture’, people tend to avoid risk taking and the mechanism of information flow predominantly remains dependent on the legacy systems and the choices of the influencers. To encourage open feedback, suggestions & to enable a culture of risk-taking, leaders need to promote change and innovation even at the cost of initial failure. The feedback mechanism, while structured and objective, should be built on the pillars of empathy where everyone stands equal in the communication hierarchy.  

I would love to know about your experiences with people, especially the relationships that have helped you evolve and grow. Do share your thoughts with me in the comments section.