Success is made of failures

We are so used to talking about success that we often forget how much failure was laid on the way to it. That’s why so many people tend to have thoughts like:

“Everything is so easy for her!”, “He’s so lucky to have his job!”, “I’m so jealous you can travel so much!”, etc., etc.

Out of sight out of mind.

We are taught not to talk about our failures because they are supposed to be those embarrassing pages from our life story that we should hide in the back of our desk drawer and never let them see the daylight. Sure if we do that, people only see our achievements, our wins, our glorious moments. But those would never happen, if it wasn’t for falls and crushes, mistakes and missteps, we’d never learn to walk and we’d definitely never grow and have a chance to become someone and do something meaningful. No matter what most of us think, it isn't luck or a victory itself that decides about our success, it is not giving up and overcoming the worst obstacles on your way.

Mistakes are natural.

Only people who do nothing commit no mistakes. That’s why only those who don’t get scared with all their life wounds and bruises and keep moving forward are capable of reaching out for more and have a chance to find their own way of happiness.?

It is only recently that we started to actually show our scars and bruises, directly and figuratively speaking, instead of doing our best to paint a perfect picture. We are all different, but still human and all the imperfections are an inherent part of nature, so it's only natural to talk about them and show them instead of denying their existence. ?Nevertheless it is still shocking for many people to discover that even those “lucky ones” have problems.

Nothing human is alien to me.

I myself am a perfect example of that imbalance. Very few people acknowledge how many hits I took in my life, how many battles I fought and keep fighting to be my own person. I FAILED. I failed countless times. Some were because I made wrong decisions but so many because I cared too much about others’ opinions. It is very hard to be your own person when you’re so different from your environment, so unless you change it, you’ll never be free of its influence.

I think most people who “know” me would say things come easy to me, I’m a lucky one, some would say too smart; but very few actually know what is behind that cheerful personality and that “all-mightiness”. Most won’t even take me seriously, if I tell them about 7 years of clinical depression, of 34 years of psychological abuse, of ongoing therapy, of how being a positive good-looking blond gives people an endlessly wrong impression of a bimbo, which I have to overcome over and over again, and so on. I will write a book about it one day, that’s for sure ??

We NEED to talk about failures.

I was also taught to keep all the bad things out of sight, I didn’t even have anyone to tell about them and seek help for years. Thankfully, I’ve learnt that it’s wrong! We NEED to talk about our weaknesses, our bad decisions, our falldowns. We all are real boys and girls and, believe me, the strongest of us are not those who can hide the pain, but those who find a way to embrace it, work through it and heal. Research shows that the higher intelligence, the more vulnerable the person, the longer is the recovery, especially when it comes to the psychological traumas.

Successful people have most failures.

When I see successful people, I don’t envy them, I admire their strength and capability to stand up for their ideas. I know for sure that their success wasn’t served on a silver platter to them. They had to make countless mistakes, start over at least several times, not give up when having all those no-sayers around, and not let go of their ideas when everyone around was skeptical about it. It takes having huge balls (metaphorically speaking) to be someone and succeed in something and if you want to have a chance for it, you need to grow a pair and arm yourself with all the patience and resistance you can, because climbing up your own mountain is never a walk in the park.

#success #howto #nevergiveup #careermotivation #marketing #cycling #human