Subtraction

We tend to keep adding things in life because there’s a perception that more is better. One more car will make me happier, and one more product will strengthen my business; it’s always a chase for one more. We are always chasing the “more” even when sometimes it makes no sense.

It’s not that wanting more is inherently bad. But it’s more important to understand the context and objective before chasing more. We are good at making to-do lists but we don’t even talk about not-to-dos. I read a quote by Molly Graham that resonated deeply: “It's easier to add process than it is to ask why we're still doing that thing that worked great two years ago but mostly isn't relevant anymore. We’re better at adding meetings than we are at removing them.” It hit me hard because I could see this in my own life.

Every time there’s a problem, we generally try to look for what new can be added to the existing situation to solve the problem. Rarely do we talk about subtracting anything. Sometimes, cutting back can provide clarity, just as much as adding something new. Before the new year starts people make lists of new habits they want to start, but rarely do they make a list of what they will stop. For example- a lot of us make plans of waking up early but this habit largely depends on NOT staying awake till late (as long as you are expecting a healthy sleeping schedule).

Subtracting the bad habits has a significant impact, often as much as adding good ones. Still, we chose addition over subtraction probably because it’s easier to add something new than to disrupt our routine by removing something. Removing feels scary because it creates a space that might appear as a hollowness in the beginning to us. This fear of emptiness keeps driving us to accumulate things and one day we don’t even know why we started adding and never stopped. We lose everything that matters in the clutter we have created over the years by adding and adding.

I have been reevaluating my life choices and actions this year. Trying to understand myself more. I had a realization during this process just how much of my life is cluttered with unnecessary additions of habits, responsibilities, and people. I am learning the art of letting go of toxic people, unnecessary commitments, and the insecurities that are holding me back. It’s an initially uncomfortable but eventually liberating experience.

I keep reminding myself of a quote I read recently: “When things aren’t adding up in your life, start subtracting.” So here I am, subtracting the unnecessary, and slowly finding more of what matters.