A Subtle Influence

"No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted."

Aesop

When I was a kid, my grandmother, Vera Hawley McMurrin, lived about a mile away from me. She was a whiz at math and English; as a young woman, she had been the bookkeeper for her father’s business, the Los Angeles Rock and Gravel Company, founded in 1914. That is also where she met my grandfather, Rulon, in 1916.

Grama, as we called her, was also a highly accomplished painter and sculptor, but where she really excelled was in being the best grandmother on the planet. Everyone adored her. She was grandmother even to the cousins on my dad’s side of the family. She personified love and kindness.

When any of us cousins argued with each other, I remember her gently saying, “Now, don’t quarrel,” and somehow that antiquated phrase settled us down. Maybe I should try that on my kids…

Grama lived next door to my aunt and uncle, and often I dropped in to visit her. I remember knocking on her door one day when I was nine or ten. She answered the door and asked me out of the blue what I wanted to be when I grew up. I answered, “A writer.” I was as surprised as she at that reply, as I had no idea I was going to say that, but in retrospect, I liked the sound of it.

Most of my reading up to that point had been comic books, song lyrics, and Hardy Boys mysteries. I didn’t give writing much thought after that conversation with Grama, but when I discovered English as a major, I fell in love with words and books. I liked that you could say the same thing a thousand different ways. Unlike math, which had only one right answer, words had infinite possibilities, and I was hooked.

Years later, our son John asked for bedtime stories, and I began to tell stories of my life and family. When our twins came along, I told them stories too. Telling those stories brought out the writer in me. I have the joy of my family to thank for that, from my grandparents to my children, and, looking forward, to my grandchildren.

My grandmother sowed many seeds of love and purpose in me. I will always be grateful for that and for her faith in me.

-Hank

"A Subtle Influence," from The Saturday Morning Post at hankfrazee.com

Photo Credit: Janice MacLean

Pictured above from left to right: Sarah LaFayette, Lynne MacLean, Janice MacLean, Aimee LaFayette, Vera McMurrin, Mary Frazee, Mary Ellen McComb