STYLES OF INTERPERSONAL INTERACTIONS

STYLES OF INTERPERSONAL INTERACTIONS

Takers are those who want to maximize profits and benefit from each transaction in which they are involved. They are preoccupied with themselves. Givers put others first. There are also others that believe in fair trade, let’s call them Matchers. They will only give what they receive.?

All three behaviors have advantages and downsides. People can take, give, or trade depending on the occasion.

Takers: willing to sacrifice relationships for short–term benefits.

Takers compete at everything and believe in the survival of the fittest. They expect favors, are domineering and seek attention, which they are not willing to give back.

There are people who appear agreeable and loving but are self–centered. Do not fall for this trick. Wherever they are found, we must learn to spot them and prevent them from exploiting us. If we have a taker in your life — whether professional or personal, we need to be assertive so that they do not continue to take advantage of our relationship with them.

Being assertive requires identifying that our time, energy and financial resources belong to our loved ones before anybody else. For example, if we are negotiating a salary and we think about the impact it would have on the people we love, it may enable us to negotiate better pay or accept an offer at higher than our present salary.

Givers: more concerned about helping others than taking credit for their efforts

We've all met someone who surprised us with their kindness. They might have contributed anything from their valuable time or a physical effort or a significant amount of money. It may have been as small as helpful suggestions. We thought it remarkable that these folks provided these goods without expecting anything in return. These friends are known as givers.

The problem with givers is that they are more concerned with how much they give than with how much they receive. Their mission is to assist others and foster group achievement. They are willing to contribute their time, knowledge, and other resources in order to provide benefit to others. It makes no difference to these folks whether their efforts are rewarded or not. It is sufficient for them to assist others in succeeding.

Matchers: strike a balance between giving and taking

Matchers demand as much as they provide – neither too much nor too little. You recognize them as folks who are continually looking for a reward for their work. Consider a buddy who provides you a ride to the airport in exchange for mowing his lawn when you return. They, unlike donors, want something of fair worth in exchange for their labor.

What matters to matchmakers is a fair trade. They fall somewhere in the between givers and takers. Their approach may be described as a tit-for-tat mindset. There is always something worthwhile for them to work on. So if they help you, they assume you owe them anything in return.?

If you do not return the favour, people will be dissatisfied and less likely to assist you in the future. This likewise applies in the other direction. When you assist a matcher, they take notice and look for the best way to reciprocate. They believe in an equitable world.

How much do we give or take?

Most people do not fit neatly into the categories of givers, takers, or matchers. Some people are matchers in one circle and givers in another. It is not rare for a matcher to move on to become a taker in another group.

The categories to which we belong change depending on the social groupings and situations in which we find ourselves. It's human nature to adapt our behaviour and expectations to the dominant attitude in a group. Most takers, for example, would look generous in public to avoid generating a negative impression. If donors perceive their donations are being taken for granted, they may donate less. Communities shape our actions.

Takers: lose more than they get when they take more than it’s necessary

Everyone has requirements. We must take what we desire in order to fulfil that need. If we continue to assert our authority, we may end up giving up more than we receive. History has demonstrated that the more individuals who continue to take without contributing, the less respect they have among their peers. This would give them a terrible reputation, making it difficult for them to interact with others. No one will be willing to give them anything if this continues.

Givers - are likely to rise to the top because:

(1) Givers are focused on growth : People typically believe that it is better to blame on the side of the taker as opposed to the giver. The common idea in politics and business is how to get more out of something or someone. Surprisingly, those who prioritize advancement over personal gain are typically at the top of both industry and politics.

(2) Givers have vast networks: Most people find it awkward when someone they haven't seen in years asks them for a favour. That is not how givers feel. Regardless of how distant their connection has become, their altruistic attitude makes it simple for them to provide favours when they can. They are always eager to assist. This mentality makes it easier for givers to ask for favours from others, even if they haven't had touch with them in years.

(3) Givers recognize and nurture the potential they find in the people: Before hiring someone, hiring managers are always seeking proof of skill. According to givers, everyone has potential whether it is visible or not. Givers are powerful in developing and nurturing skills. Their counterparts receive complete support, which leads to successful mentorship on the side of the giver.

Givers can only rise to the top if :

Successful givers are always on top of their game. However, not every giver gets it that far. Many of them burn out trying to please everyone. To avoid this, givers must be capable of detecting and dealing with takers, especially the excessive variety. According to common thinking, the best method is to spend less time supporting others. Surprisingly, recent study suggests that concentrating on the impact of helping others is the best way to go. Givers must also establish a plan for dealing with individuals who want to exploit their generosity. To accomplish so, they must know when to react to a taker's behaviour and when not to. This tactic is known as 'generous tit-for-tat.' This suggests that donors should limit their generosity when takers take them for granted. However, they should periodically let their giving nature take over and make polite gestures to the taker. This would allow the donor to maintain control while motivating the taker to adapt — and most likely become a matcher.