The Student Becomes the Teacher: Rethinking Mentorship

Mentorship is often seen as a top-down relationship: a seasoned professional imparts wisdom, guidance, and experience to someone navigating earlier stages of their career. Recently, I took on a new mentee through the Camp Professionals Collective Mentor-Mentee Program. I have had several other mentees in the past and as such, my approach to this new mentee relationship was going to be the same. As a mentor, I believed it was my role to teach, guide, and support my mentee in their journey.

But something unexpected happened during a recent check-in with my mentee. This conversation revealed a more nuanced and powerful truth about mentorship: the most transformative relationships are reciprocal. Both mentors and mentees bring valuable insights to the table. When both are open to learning, the impact of the relationship multiplies.

An Eye-Opening Conversation

During our recent check-in, I shared an exciting update; I had been invited to speak at several camp conferences in the new year, addressing the unique challenges of leading a new generation of camp counselors. My proposed presentations would focus on how this new generation of counselors differs in work style, values, boundaries, and motivations from counselors of years past.

I asked my mentee, a member of this younger generation, for her thoughts. What she shared was truly mind-blowing: at least to me.

She explained that her generation continues to feel the social and emotional effects of the pandemic deeply. The extended isolation during key formative years of their young adulthood disrupted their ability to connect and left lasting impressions on how they engage with others. At camp, this has translated into a stronger emphasis on peer-to-peer connections, acknowledgment, and celebrations. While supervisor-to-counselor relationships remain important, they are no longer the central source of motivation or belonging.

Instead, her generation thrives when they feel connected to their peers, when their contributions are recognized, and when their efforts are celebrated collectively. As she spoke, she tied these observations to the broader needs for belonging and contribution that camp counselors often feel. This perspective gave me a deeper understanding of how I can adapt my leadership style and structure my conference presentations to better resonate with today’s camp staff. It made me realize that my job as a leader in camping is often to facilitate versus directing.

More importantly, it reinforced a fundamental lesson: sometimes the student becomes the teacher.

Rethinking Mentorship

This conversation shifted my understanding of mentorship. It’s not just about what I, as a mentor, can teach. It’s also about what I can learn. Mentees—especially those from different generations, experiences, or backgrounds—bring unique perspectives that can challenge our assumptions, broaden our horizons, and enrich our understanding.

This reciprocal nature of mentorship is critical for anyone looking to lead effectively in an ever-changing world. As mentors, we should embrace curiosity, humility, and adaptability to fully realize the potential of these relationships.

Lessons for Mentors: Learning Through the Relationship

If you’re a mentor, consider these strategies to create a truly reciprocal mentorship dynamic:

1. Adopt a Learner’s Mindset: Mentorship isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about asking the right questions. Be curious about your mentee’s experiences, values, and challenges. Use their insights to inform your leadership and decision-making.
2. Create Space for Reverse Feedback: Empower your mentee to give you feedback. Ask them, “What could I be doing differently to support you better?” or “Do you see any blind spots in how I approach this issue?” This not only helps you grow but also models openness and vulnerability.
3. Embrace Generational Perspectives: Each generation brings unique strengths, challenges, and priorities. Learn from your mentee about how their generation perceives leadership, work-life balance, and communication. These insights can help you adapt to changing workforce dynamics.
4. Apply What You Learn: Mentorship is only as impactful as the actions you take. When your mentee shares valuable insights, reflect on how you can integrate them into your work. For me, this meant rethinking my conference presentations and exploring new ways to build peer-to-peer connections at camp.
5. Recognize and Value Their Expertise: Mentees often possess expertise in areas you may not. Whether it’s technology, social trends, or generational dynamics, acknowledge their contributions and allow them to teach you.

Lessons for Mentees: “Coaching Up” with Confidence

For mentees, mentorship is an opportunity not only to learn but also to lead. “Coaching up”—sharing insights, feedback, and ideas with someone more experienced—can be a valuable skill in any professional setting. Here’s how to approach it:

1. Share Your Perspective Authentically: Don’t underestimate the value of your voice. Speak openly about your experiences and how they shape your views. For example, my mentee’s willingness to share her perspective on the social/emotional effects of the pandemic provided me with insights I wouldn’t have gained otherwise.
2. Ask Thought-Provoking Questions: Encourage your mentor to think differently by asking reflective questions. For instance, “How do you think your leadership style resonates with people my age?” or “What changes have you noticed in the workplace over the years, and how do you adapt?”
3. Frame Feedback as Collaboration: Providing feedback to a mentor can feel intimidating, but framing it as a collaborative effort can help. Use phrases like, “Have you considered this approach? It might resonate more with people in my generation.”
4. Take Initiative to Share Knowledge: Whether it’s helping your mentor navigate new technology or offering insights into cultural trends, seize opportunities to contribute. This not only enriches the relationship but also builds your confidence as a leader.
5. Recognize the Value You Bring: You were chosen for the mentorship because of your potential. Embrace that. Your insights are valuable, and your willingness to “coach up” shows initiative and leadership.

Why This Matters

For me, the biggest takeaway from this mentorship moment is that growth happens when both parties are open to learning. As mentors, we should strive to empower our mentees not only to learn but also to teach. As mentees, we should feel confident in contributing to the mentor’s growth.

To my fellow mentors: Don’t just mentor—learn. Create space for your mentees to teach you, and apply those lessons to your leadership.

To mentees: Don’t just learn—teach. Embrace your ability to “coach up” and recognize the value you bring to the relationship.

This dynamic isn’t just beneficial—it’s essential in today’s rapidly changing world. Leaders who are willing to listen and adapt will be better equipped to navigate the complexities of modern workplaces. Emerging professionals who can “coach up” will bring fresh ideas and solutions to the table. Together, they create a partnership that fosters mutual growth and understanding.