Stuck Where You Don't Belong

“Change is painful, but nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don’t belong.” ―Mandy Hale

Why are we soooo resistant to change? ?

Even when we realize that change is very much needed in our lives, we still either resist it or fear the very idea of changing. For many, facing change is paralyzing.

Change can be a powerful blow to the ego… a reckoning of sorts, that brings to light something about ourselves that we would rather not accept. It can also represent unwillingness to realize that we may have made an error in judgement, resulting in unhappiness, suffering, and pain to ourselves and others. Fear of the unknown is often a significant aspect of resisting change.?

Change may mean leaving an abusive relationship, choosing a different profession, choosing a new circle of friends that are more evolved, overcoming substance abuse, choosing a healthier lifestyle, being a more available and loving parent, or many other necessary changes that will improve our lives.

Firstly, it is important to understand that wherever you are in your life right now and no matter what your circumstances may be in this moment, the decisions that brought you here, were based on choices made at your level of consciousness and understanding at the time that you made those choices. We can only ever function at our current level of understanding.? ?

I don’t know about you, but I am not at all the same person now, that I was when I was 20 years old. Sometimes decisions made in our youth were not wise, landing us in situations where abuse, lack of support, significant incompatibility, and being treated with disrespect have become the daily norm, in all of our relationships for decades, leaving us “comfortably numb”.?

Secondly, once you realize that your current life is not compatible with who you really are as a being now, there is no shame in shedding old patterns that no longer serve you to embrace your true self, and forging a life that is more compatible with who you are.?

It is not our “lot” in life to suffer endlessly for innocent errors in judgement made long ago before we knew better. Wisdom is realizing your current life is not allowing you to grow or be the best that you can be.?

As you are reading this, perhaps you have come to a fork in the road of your life.

One path will keep you plodding along in the status quo of your unhappy, unfulfilled life, leaving you longing for more.?

The other path will lead you toward an entirely different direction, to an inward journey that will exorcise the demons that have prevented you from being yourself. The path inward requires facing your pain and conquering the fear of letting go of people, situations, and past regrets that are holding you back.?

It is in facing yourself and all of your fears, that you actually find yourself.?

Once you have made your metaphorical way back “home”, you can choose the life you really want to experience. One that is compatible with who you really are,? to rekindle the hopes and dreams that you let go of many years ago.?

Change is not easy.? It requires much of you emotionally and sometimes physically. The decision to make changes, is yours alone to make, but worth the effort.

The choice really comes down to this:? Do you want to continue living in the same way you have been and feel unhappy for the rest of your lifetime? Or,? do you want a different life, that allows you to be who you really are at the core of your being??

If you decide to make changes to improve your life, expect your loved ones and friends to either accept your changes and make changes of their own to support you, or they will resist seeing you as you really are, choosing to only see the person that you were.

If you choose to remain in unhappy or unhealthy circumstances simply to please others while sacrificing yourself, think very carefully about that decision. When you are doing all of the sacrificing and giving, while those who surround you are doing all of the taking without giving anything back, the happiness you are seeking will remain illusive.

You are worthy of love, emotional support, respect, and mutual admiration in all of your relationships and life situations, without exception.? You do not deserve to be stuck in a place where you have never belonged. You are worthy of so much more. ?

Once you understand who you really are and embrace your true worth, change will cease to be a burden or something to fear. Your fears will be replaced by determination and empowerment that will help you to rise up from the ashes of your life, like the mighty Phoenix.?

Resources and support

If you are feeling stuck and need individualized support, message me to schedule a discovery call:? [email protected] ?