Stuck on Covid19
Lavinia Thanapathy
LinkedIn Top Voice ?? TEDx Speaker x 2 ?? Linkedin Trainer ?? Author: Unleash Your Voice ?? Founding Chair Inspiring Girls SG ?? Advisory Board Member ??
I read somewhere that we should all come out of quarantine fitter, speaking a new language, with organised closets, honing our cooking skills, baking our own bread among many other wonderful skills that we are to acquire with all our newfound time.
This to me is hogwash. Utter nonsense. ?
We might well be able to do some of this and post it on social media for validation but it ignores the massive collective trauma and emotional upheaval that all of us are experiencing in this period of unprecedented change. ?
We generally agree that change is inevitable but few of us regularly work on building our change muscles to be ready for the changes that we know are coming. ??
A lot of change is emotional and yet we treat it as operational. This is our fundamental difficulty with change. We approach it in a way that does not serve us.
It isn’t about doing this or that. It is allowing ourselves the space to feel. To grieve, to heal, to find & feel gratitude, for kindness, to safely dispel anger & frustration, and to redefine our life compass. We need to stumble and sometimes fall before we regain our footing to carry on. ?
I’m happy for anyone who is enjoying the lockdown, this wasn't written to negate your positive experience. But if you are struggling, please don’t think you are alone.
All the hyper-positivity and hyper-productivity you see in others is not always the whole story. It is often a coping mechanism to deal with the uncertainty of our times. There is nothing wrong with it. It helps many people to cope. But its not a panacea for everyone.
It’s ok to not be living your best life right now. It will not decide your success in the new future. Wherever you are and whatever you are experiencing, it is real for you and you are entitled to feel it.
If it is spiraling you down, I recommend setting an alarm with a note, "Time’s Up". Then however low you are, pick yourself up and breathe. Reach out and connect with a friend or a coach. Focus on to the things that you can control. See if you can help someone else. It will all be alright eventually. ?
Clean your online space along with your physical space and your hands. Get rid of the people who do not add to your well-being. Pause or block anyone causing you distress whether with their unrelenting negativity or positivity. ?
As for me, myself and I. Well, I felt mentally stuck yesterday, but today my alarm rang and “time’s up”. So I am choosing hopefulness for the day and after a virtual coffee with my best friend this morning, I am ready for anything.
Be kind to yourself and others. Everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about.?
Whether you come out of the quarantine with new skills and added gusto for life or if you just about make it through with your mental and physical health intact, its ok. Breathe, be kind to yourself and let it go.?
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Lavinia Thanapathy is a motivational speaker on the people aspects of change. Her signature keynote “Embrace the Crazy” helps corporations and individuals to identify and strengthen their mental fortitude for change.
Lavinia is also an active advocate for gender equity and is a Vice President of the Singapore Council for Women’s Organisations where she chairs the Inspiring Girls Singapore programme. Lavinia is also the immediate Past President of PrimeTime Business & Professional Women’s Association and a former ExCo and Board Member of the charity HCS Hospice Care.
Lavinia co-wrote and co-edited the Amazon bestseller “Unleash Your Voice – Powerful Public Speaking for Every Woman” and regularly helps women to overcome their fear of public speaking with workshops and private coaching.
She found refuge from her education as a lawyer in branding and communications and has over 20 years of experience in protecting and promoting the reputation of organisations.
Lavinia manages her large unwieldy diplomatic family via WhatsApp. Her 4 adult stepchildren and 1 minor child occasionally consult her on their upbringing & well-being. Her husband, a former German Ambassador, has the patience of a diplomat and saint.
You are welcome to connect with Lavinia on her public social media channels
You can buy the book Unleash Your Voice, Powerful Public Speaking for Every Woman on Amazon and Book Depository
https://www.amazon.com/Unleash-Your-Voice-Powerful-Speaking/dp/154374995X
https://www.bookdepository.com/Unleash-Your-Voice-Lavinia-Thanapathy/9781543749960
Reaching your milestone to success by removing what is blocking you through a coaching conversation.
4 年so inspiring, thank you, thanks for allowing humanity and encouraging compassion in this so challenging time, bravo!
Humanity's Engineer | Volunteer Strategist for UN Africa Women in STEM | Founding Member of nFormation | Director at Deloitte
4 年Lavinia - another great article from you! I enjoy reading your reflections as I sat down for my morning tea. Change is hard - it does involve emotions - treating it operationally does no one any good. There will be a lot of positive and negatives through this collective experience, and each of our journeys will be our own. And that’s perfectly okay. Ps - thank you for the virtual coffee chat idea, it’s become a norm for me as I connect and reconnect with families, friends and acquaintances. Can’t wait for our next one.