Struggle

Written by Jason Haines

“More than that we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” -Romans 5:3-5

Over the years, and like so many other of my friends, I always thought that God wouldn’t except me for all that I have done. One of the big comments has always been, “God will strike me with lightening if I enter the church for the things I have done.” Many times, though we said this because we felt we were just being tough in front of our friends and cared more about how they saw us that how God saw us. Believe it or not, this is a sin to put others ahead of God and not live in the way of the lord. Now that does not mean help those in need, it means to not put those that will ridicule you ahead of God because in the end their opinions will not matter to God, only your actions.

This was one thing I struggled with throughout the years because on one hand I didn’t care what others thought of me, but on the other I did. I still struggle with this and I probably will always struggle with it because human nature is different from what God does. See, I have over the years, started to realize there was only ever one perfect person and that was Jesus Christ, God’s son, and the rest of us must try to achieve that perfection but never will. As Vince Lombardi once said, “perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection, we can catch excellence.” This is true in so many areas of our life and true in so many areas of my life.

I will not proclaim to be perfect, and never will try to be again but I will strive to live a better more God like life and put Jesus Christ before anything else. I believe that I am trying to achieve that and know that God has a plan for me. It may not happen today or tomorrow but will happen. I have faith and just want to talk more about it. I wasn’t perfect and I am a sinner as well as many of my family and friends, so if I can do it, we all can. I do not want any of these papers to tell anyone they are wrong; I actually just want to tell my story in short story form.