Strong as a Mother

I've been thinking a lot about strength this week. It's showing up in all areas of my life and whenever that happens, I consider it a sign that I should pay attention.

"Strong opinions, loosely held." - used to explain what I might expect from a senior leader.

"Strength training is the most important health change a woman can make." - advice on my eternal quest to navigate perimenopause.

"We are stronger together." - rallying women to band together around the cause of saving our country.

"I'm not sure I'm strong enough to handle this." - an honest sentiment from a friend going through a hard time.

Where there is no struggle, there is no strength. - Oprah Winfrey

What has me thinking is that in spite of the common trope that women are weak, it's never been something that's been a barrier for me. In fact, depicting strength is more of an over-used skill that often hides where I'm feeling "less-than."

At my best, I might be seen as strong. My entrepreneurial career bolstered my grit, independence and risk-taking from an early age. These are all qualities I'm extremely proud of and for the most part, they serve me well.

However, at my worst I am seen as over-bearing. Whether it's a topic I'm passionate about, an injustice I've witnessed, or someone doing anything remotely harmful to my kids, look out.

It's why my, "Strong as a Mother" shirt is among my favorites.

But strength is more than being Mama Bear.

• It's being last to speak, creating space to others to show up.
• It's cheering someone on who's trying something for the first time, even if you know you can do it better yourself.
• It's softening to receive support from others because just because you CAN do it all, doesn't mean you should.
• It's maintaining an open mind and heart, even and especially when tough times or people are coming at you.

As we navigate challenging times, individually and collectively, I wonder what outcomes might be better if we were to take a both/and approach...

Balancing strength and gentleness.

Combining power with compassion.

Merging resilience and tenderness.

Integrating firmness and empathy.

Blending fortitude with kindness.

Fusing determination with warmth.

Supporting and being supportable.

I, for one, think I would be able to take much needed, deliberate exhale.