Stressed by marriage?

Feeling stressed like you can bite off his head? Almost at your breaking point soaking in her relentless pressure? Why do you stress each other? What do you gain by making life difficult for each other? Who pays you for stressing him? What do you gain by stressing her? Want a peaceful marriage?

First, take responsibility for your peace. Nobody can take away your peace. And no human can bring you peace. Peace comes from God. Peace has to come from within you. When you have inner peace, someone else’s behavior will not stress you. When things inside you change, things around you change.

Second, stop running away from responsibility. Stop running away from your choices. This guy was your choice. This woman was your choice. You have the partner you deserve. Come to terms with this fact. Your partner, your choice. If you were duped during courting, you are immature for marriage.

Third, stop blame games and invest in your marriage. It’s easier to resolve issues than to dissolve a relationship. No relationship works by autopilot. Marriage does not work; marriage is caused to work. Stop complaining and begin working on your marriage. What brought you guys together? When did the rains begin to beat you? What do you like about your partner? Do you really want to throw it away?

Why do you find easier to invest in professional courses and not in your most important relationships? How much did you pay for your college education? How many books did you read? How many hours did you invest for your degree? How much sacrifice did you make to graduate? How many times did you ask for peer help when you were stuck with an assignment? Did you quit after failing a test?

Suppose you invest half of that energy and resources in your marriage? Suppose you read together a book on marriage once a month? Suppose you do one marriage course per year? Suppose you attend a marriage seminar semi-annually? Suppose you visit a professional marriage therapist before a conflict escalates? Suppose you hang out with two couples who are doing well in their marriage?  

DR. K. N. JACOB