Strengths & Weaknesses

- Two sides of the same coin

In the simplest of words, if we attempt to understand this apparently mystical phenomenon of strengths and weaknesses, it would be thus – As the day begins we go through a series of mundane, cyclical and significant activities or certain events unfolding before us. Each activity/event rouses in us primarily these feelings; empowering, impeding or neutral.

Isn’t it worth considering that something within us gets stimulated by the occurrence of the activities/events which in turn enhances or diminishes these feelings of empowerment, impediments or neutrality?

There are two approaches to examine this:

One is an inside-out approach, where we dig deep into the stimulus itself, take apart its very nature, and see how it does and doesn’t respond to the external occurring. This is a more difficult approach if one is just at the entry point to understanding oneself.

?The other approach is the outside-in approach, where we pick up the clues from our external environment as it is more easily perceived by us where we stand and accessible at the batting of an eye.?

For the purpose of this article, we shall adopt the outside-in approach to understand how an external occurrence generates a feeling of worthiness/unworthiness within us, and what is its relation to our strengths and weaknesses.

?Where do we begin?

One thing is very clear to us. That one thing is - ‘what we want to feel.’ It may be not clear in a very concrete manner as the sole object of our desire. However, we are clear on what we want to experience, we have some clarity on the aspects of this aspirational experience, and we have managed to break it down into smaller chunks, the immediate wants which will provide us gratification to move forward eventually to the sole object of desire. And, this is where we begin.

We take these bite-size chunks (the aspirational experience) as our first entry into understanding our internal strengths.

?These bite-sized chunks which are our intermittent goal at present, hold the potential to be our guide itself. How?

?This is how,

?What are these chunks?

-?????? That which we want to experience within as an immediate goal

-?????? That which holds the potential to provide us gratification in the near future

-?????? Those broken-down aspirations as we move inadvertently towards the sole object of desire

?One may ask, how do these broken-down aspirations act as a guide?

-?????? These aspirations have a direct line connected to certain values within us

-?????? As these aspirations get clearer, we seek to find ways to manifest them in our reality

-?????? In this process of reiterating, reconfirming and reinforcing these aspirations, we can identify what are those values within us that shine the most ?

-?????? These chunks thus, which began as aspirations, slowly turn into a guide and open a window into our own value system

?What does my value system tell me?

This fresh sneak peek into my value system brings me face-to-face with my guiding forces as well as my inhibiting forces in life. For the first time, I can see the light that shines through me and also the darkness that creates a shadow on me. If I dare to go deeper into the light and the darkness, I can identify the root of that light and the cause of the darkness. Mere identification will not be of much help as there is a place for both inside me. As a matter of fact, I spot the light because of the existing darkness.

?So what do I do? Where do I place my focus on?

?As I remorse in the darkness, it grows larger in length and breadth, and the light starts to wither away eventually getting fainter.

And, if I accept the existence of darkness and parallelly fuel the light, it shines brighter slowly, yet steadily. I have to keep adding fuel to keep it lit and at some point in time, it self-sustains.

?What is this light?

?The light within me that is discovered through the guiding forces of my aspirations is my strength.

?What is the darkness?

?The darkness is the other side of the coin, which is also discovered through my aspirations, acting as a constraining force as I move towards my goals.

?Existing within me

?Exists within me, both strengths and weaknesses. Strengths once identified and embraced through the analytical process of an outside-in approach, then do not just wait for an external occurrence to get stimulated. They take over the majority of the personality, the subtle handover of being a guide happens from the hands of the aspirations to the light of internal strengths. ?

?The same is true with the other side of the coin as well; the weaknesses. The subtle handover happens here too if rather than accepting its existence, I keep diving into the depth of its darkness and in turn lose the way to come out of it.

What choice do I have then?

?The aspirations will always remain. They will arise as desires now and then, till the creative forces within us are active. It will be up to us to let these aspirations remain wishful thinking or convert them into goals. Those goals which hold the potential to become a guide, lead us through the link that it has to our inner light, the light of our strengths!

The choice I have is whether to connect to the light while I accept the darkness. Or feel afraid when I come across the darkness within and overlook the light which also exists parallel to it.

The choice I have is to nurture the light of my strengths or be lost in the shadows of my weaknesses.

The choice I have is to be cognizant of the verity that the strengths and weaknesses I have, are but two sides of the same coin. The coin is my internal world, which has been groomed and nurtured by not just the occurrence of the circumstances in life till now, but also how I stored those circumstances within me.

The choice I have is to take responsibility for the reality of my internal world and through the choices I have made in life, and yet, choose again to make another choice. The choice of seeing the light within me!