A Strategic Approach to Developing 'Maturity'

The cambridge dictionary defines maturity as the quality of behaving mentally and emotionally like an adult.

Although this word is frequently tossed around, the definition is quite vague.

People often say that the best way to deal with immature people is to increase your own immaturity. But how can one do it exactly?

The most comprehensive answer I could find was by Suleman Ahmer, a coach and trainer. He developed the maturity model to give a comprehensive view of what to look for in a person to decide whether they are mature. As per his model, there are three levels to maturity:

1. Core
2. Character
3. Competence

Core

The core consists a person's vision in life, their purpose in life, and the purpose of their vision. All this needs to be derived from an ideology they believe in. Ideology is mainly the religion they follow, but it can also be a philosophy they believe in. The point of the ideology is to ensure that the three things: vision, purpose, purpose of the vision are aligned with each other and there is no conflict.

There is a saying that if you dont know where you are sailing, no wind is favourably. Another one of my favourite quote is, those who stand for nothing, fall for anything. Not only the direction, but the reason why you are going there is also important. Combining all three of these things with ideology makes a lot of sense.

Having a strong core is critical, which is why core stands for almost 50% of a person's maturity.

Character

Not enough is discussed in building character traits in modern education or even parenting today. Developing positive character traits and reducing negative traits is what constitutes character building. A person who is more honest, courageous, humble is obviously more mature than a person who is petty, selfish and arrogant.

Character traits amount to around 30% of the maturity.

Competence

Competence amounts to only 20%. It contains your soft and hard skills.

This is what the modern education system has us running after. Education is commodified and the focus is only on producing productive members of the economy. People who do not have any core or character, and too much of competence usually end up successful, but only in the material sense. It doesn't make them mature. Maybe that's why we have things called midlife crisis, or small men in big offices.

How to Develop Maturity

The way to improve in all these areas is by strategically pursuing knowledge and wisdom simultaneously in all three areas throughout ones life. Whether it be through formal education, mentorship, coaching, reading, and getting exposure to the relevant environment.