A story about Self-Awareness

I need to make an admission, I've posted a lot in the last few months about leadership development.

My admission…I'm not that far ahead, if at all, of anyone who is reading this. I'm not an expert. I haven’t done a boatload of academic research. Currently, as a solo-preneur, I don't even have a team!!

Now for what I am…

I am committed to learning and growing as a leader and as a coach. A coach who just may be able to help others to learn and grow themselves by providing some perspective and objectivity to the struggles they are having.

In this post, I want share a personal story about one thing that helped me learn to be more self-aware and, hopefully, become a little more effective as a leader later on. By reflecting on experiences and seeking feedback from others, I was able to develop a deeper understanding of myself and our impact on each other.

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Early in my time in government, our small team of three sought team-building opportunities that also offered insight into the work of our colleagues. We enrolled in one such event with the intention of learning more about their work and spending time together as a team.

For the record, it's so long ago that I don't even remember what the course was called. The course, on the whole, was... okay. It provided CPD hours for our colleagues, but the content could have been delivered in about a third of the time. However...

One small part of that course has stuck with me for the last 15 years.

As individuals, we perceive our day as a film. It runs continuously through the hours at work—sometimes busy, sometimes less so, encompassing productive times and laid-back moments, fun and stress, etc.

However, our leaders don't see our day that way. Instead of the entire movie, they see snapshots of our day when we connect with them—when we ask a question, provide a briefing, or when they give direction or feedback. These are small snippets without all the context that we see in our film.

Our team embraced this insight as an opportunity to ensure we were communicating the right things and the most important tasks to our Director. This helped us manage and prioritize our workload, making him aware of when we had capacity for the inevitable fires that would come up. We learned to be group-aware, enhancing our effectiveness for short-term tasks and long-term projects.

Later, as a leader, I wanted to be conscious of this from the opposite perspective. I wanted to recognize that I only saw snapshots, not the entire films, of my team. I aimed to work with them to ensure I knew the right information so I could provide support. I focused on building relationships and trust, clearing obstacles for them. I acknowledged that there were things happening in their days or lives that I didn't know about, but through the trust we had built, I could support them nonetheless.

These relationships and trust allowed me to advocate for them to have ownership over their work. They could rely on me for guidance and information without facing gatekeeping.

The key takeaway from this is that leaders don't have all the context, and frankly, they don't need it. Leading while always looking over shoulders to ensure things are done 'right' is micromanaging.

Make space for ownership and growth. This will always involve having trust in those who are doing the work. They (and you) will have good and bad days. Whether you know the context will depend on the relationship you have with them, but either way, let them show up and get at it. Be aware of your own 'film' and watch for the team's snapshots of success!