The Stories We Tell Ourselves

Have you ever told yourself a story? One about yourself maybe? Where you thought you were not good enough, perhaps? Take a moment to stop and think about the stories you might tell yourself in a given day. I would say that we tell ourselves multiple stories throughout the day, sometimes the same one! When you think about these things that you say to yourself, that you seem to believe, do they make you feel good? Or do they totally ruin any sort of good mood you have or stop all motivation?

I know I asked many questions above but I wanted to make you think before we got into things. I wanted you to be aware of what might be going on in your head because I will tell you, that I use to believe the stories, that I was not good enough, never pretty enough, not smart enough, not man enough, etc. I made the excuse of “I have heard it from others growing up so it must be true”. Why do we give these stories power? To be honest, I am not entirely sure why we believe them. I am working on my journey through self-discovery and building the life that I want. This is an entirely new thought process for me, to acknowledge these stories and breathe through them and to believe that I have every power to stop these negative thoughts from forming about how I view myself.

I suffer the most from making up assumptions or stories of what I THINK other people are thinking of me. I put those assumptions out there and then I am mad that is how they think or view me. However, they never said any of it, I am just judging myself and blaming others. Which is a bad cycle to get into. When I am sad, I try not to cry, I try to be strong and not show my emotion until it is too late and then I breakdown.

I officially have been told to take the word try out of my vocabulary. I would say things like, I am trying to be better, I am trying to fit it into my schedule, I am trying to process, etc. The word TRY is almost a copout of actually doing the thing you are talking about doing. I am trying to get out of bed, when really I want to stay in bed but it sounds better if I say I am trying, when in actual fact I just need to roll out of bed and I am out. Something so simple, yet it needs to be said that I am trying.  After today, there will be no more trying, only doing. I vow that I am working on removing this word out of my vocabulary!

Building a better foundation of thought and actions, working on controlling my stories or at least accepting them and moving on with redirecting them with forgiveness and kindness towards myself. 2021 is going to be a major year of growth, strength and overall building beautiful mountains to climb and reach my goals. Nothing in life is easy, and if it were, it would be boring. I am taking my past, accepting it, moving forward and proving every judgement I have given myself that it was false. That I am a strong, badass woman who is going to get what she wants and be her best damn self!