Stop Waiting—Here’s How to Confidently Advocate for Yourself!

Let’s be honest—advocating for ourselves can feel uncomfortable. Whether it’s asking for a raise, a promotion, or simply making sure your voice is heard, it often feels like we’re stepping outside our comfort zone.

But here’s the truth: If you don’t advocate for yourself, no one else will. Self-advocacy is essential for your career growth, and yet, so many of us hold back, struggling with the confidence to ask for what we deserve.

What’s Holding You Back?

Fear of being seen as “difficult.”

Many of us worry that by speaking up, we’ll come across as demanding or disruptive. Instead, we stay quiet, hoping our work will speak for itself. But here’s the truth: If you don’t advocate for yourself, your contributions can easily be overlooked. Your voice is necessary to ensure your value is recognized.

Self-doubt and imposter syndrome.

Imposter syndrome—feeling like you’re not as competent as others perceive—can make it hard to ask for what you deserve. When you feel like a fraud, you’re less likely to advocate for yourself, often thinking you haven’t “earned” the right to ask for more. This mindset keeps you stuck in the shadows, downplaying your real achievements.

Wanting to be “liked.”

We all want to fit in and maintain good relationships with our colleagues. But advocating for yourself doesn’t mean you’re stepping on toes or putting others down—it’s about standing up for your value. Your worth is not tied to others' perceptions but to the contributions you bring to the table.

Conditioning to be “nice” or “accommodating” (especially for women).

For women, the pressure to be agreeable and avoid making waves can feel especially strong. We’re often socialized to be accommodating, to prioritize harmony over confrontation. But advocating for yourself isn’t breaking the rules—it’s rewriting them. It’s about owning your space and knowing that speaking up is a sign of confidence, not conflict.

"You can't expect others to recognize your worth if you're not willing to voice it yourself."

Strategies for Overcoming These Barriers:

Reframe Self-Advocacy as Professional Development.

Advocating for yourself is not about arrogance—it’s about knowing your worth and ensuring that your contributions are recognized. Reframe self-advocacy as a key aspect of your professional development. Just like learning new skills or taking on leadership roles, advocating for yourself is a necessary part of growing in your career. When you advocate for yourself, you’re also advocating for your future success.

Start Small, Build Confidence: Confidence grows with practice.

Start small by advocating for yourself in low-stakes situations—whether it’s speaking up in a meeting or asking for more responsibility on a project. The more you do it, the more natural it will feel. These small wins build the confidence you need to advocate for yourself in bigger ways, like asking for a promotion or raise.

Shift the Narrative from “Me” to “We”.

If advocating for yourself feels uncomfortable, try framing it as a benefit to the company. When you ask for a raise or promotion, emphasize how your growth will positively impact the team or organization. By focusing on the value you bring and how your development benefits everyone, the conversation feels less like a personal request and more like a professional strategy.

Prepare and Practice.

One of the best ways to overcome fear is preparation. Before any self-advocacy conversation, write down your achievements, contributions, and how they’ve impacted the organization. Practice your talking points so you can approach the conversation with clarity and confidence. The more prepared you are, the less intimidating the conversation will be.

"Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes." – Maggie Kuhn

One Actionable Confidence-Building Tip

Here’s a quick exercise to boost your confidence when you’re preparing to advocate for yourself:

Write a “Brag List.”

Take a few minutes to list out your accomplishments over the past year.

• What projects have you led?
• How have you contributed to your team’s success?
• What skills have you developed?

Keep this list handy and review it before you go into any meeting where you need to advocate for yourself. Seeing your wins on paper will remind you of your value and give you the confidence to speak up.

The bottom line? Self-advocacy is essential. It’s not about being pushy—it’s about owning your value and making sure your contributions are recognized. The more you practice it, the easier it will become, and the more confident you’ll feel advocating for yourself in every area of your career.

It’s time to stop shrinking back and start stepping into your power.

With confidence, Nayli Russo

This newsletter is brought to you by Nayli Russo. To dive further into strategies for professional growth, visit my website, watch weekly episodes on my Youtube Channel and connect with me on Instagram.

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