Stop Turning People Off on LinkedIn - 5 Steps to Network Strategically

How do I get better responses to my cold network messages on LinkedIn?

I recently got this question from someone who was feeling dejected after she had gotten no replies after reaching out to a bunch of people on LinkedIn.

When I prodded, it became clear that she had a large network and plenty of common connections to the people she wanted to reach. But instead of going through those introductions, she was just copying and pasting the same message that said she was looking for a job and whether the person knew of something that would be a fit for her.

There are a few problems with this approach.

One, she expected the person she was reaching out to do the heavy lifting of figuring out what type of role or job our friend wanted by going through her profile and scanning her information. Very few people will take the trouble to do that for a stranger.

Two, she wanted something from that person (a job, an introduction, help) but she didn't bother researching how she could be useful to them.

Three, she didn't engage or comment on any of their posts or articles on LinkedIn, if they had any. She didn't bother to check their activity, which meant she often missed something that the person cares about deeply that she could have mentioned in her message.

Four, she didn't go through a common connection that could have provided a warm introduction. Sending a message to someone directly may seem easier, but it's got two major issues: The person may have too many messages from strangers in their inbox to pay attention to any of them.

And, second, if they see you're connected to someone they know but didn't bother to get introduced, they may suspect that the common connection doesn't think highly of you to provide an introduction. Or at least they'll likely wonder: "why didn't they ask X to introduce them to me?"

And Five, this person fell into the trap of doing networking the "default" way, which is transactional networking. In my experience, that's the most common mode of "networking" for 95% of people out there.

They only "network" when they need something urgently - a job, a lead, an investor, etc.

The 2 Types of Networking

By contrast, the type of networking that produces results is strategic networking or networking that is focused on building a relationship over time and not on a transaction.

And yet, only 5% of people seem to engage in it, although it's been widely touted by leaders and influencers like Adam Grant (in his book "Give and Take") or Reid Hoffman (who touts building relationships with your "board of directors" in his books and podcasts "The Startup of You").

Why?

My hypothesis, based on numerous conversations with people in all stages of career transition, is that "networking" is considered to be a chore by most. It does take work to connect with people and follow their developments and make the effort to send a message or call them once in a while.

So strategic networking falls into the category of one of those "important but not urgent" things that people simply kick down the road and procrastinate on.

Simply put, most people are too lazy to do strategic networking and build relationships over time. Just like most people watch Netflix instead of working out. It's much easier to push the TV remote control button than to go to bed early so you can work out in the morning.

So, what do you do if you need to do networking to find a job now but you have been neglecting your network?

The answer is:

If you want to stop turning people off on LinkedIn, you need to start doing strategic, not transactional, networking right away, even if you've never done it.

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.

What follows in this article is me showing you how to kick-start strategic networking from zero with a few useful frameworks that I and my clients have successfully used in our careers.

A quick note to those of you who are NOT in need of something urgent right now from your networks.

If you haven’t been building a strategic network but you’re working at a company that may still be hiring, now is a golden opportunity to ACCELERATE and strengthen your network by helping as many good and talented people in your network as you can. This means proactively reaching out 1:1 to people who have been laid off or fallen on hard times using the frameworks I offer here.

Now, if you’re finding yourself in the tricky spot of having neglected your network AND needing job referrals because you’ve been laid off, listen up.

This is your step-by-step guide on how to do it.

The 5 Steps to Strategic Networking

1. Assess your existing network. Go to the “Connections tab” on LinkedIn and look at the people you’re connected with now.
2. Prioritize your network by strength of relationship - how well they know you. List your top 30-50 people that you’re connected with based on how well they know you in a spreadsheet. Then, chunk that list out in batches of 5. Every day, for the next few weeks, focus on one batch. Spend 5 minutes going through each person’s activity and profile on LinkedIn checking in on news around this person. Note any major developments in your spreadsheet - like promotions, changes in jobs, layoffs, the name of their current company, how long they’ve been there.
3. F.I.L. your message. You don’t want to be spamming people with “I’ve been laid off. Help! I need ANY job”. You need to understand what One Job Function (F), industry (I) and level (L) you’re targeting for your next move. Keeping broad here will kill your chances. Update your LinkedIn profile to reflect the precise keywords for that F.I.L. (function/industry/level).

Example: Instead of "I can be a program or a product manager and I can work in healthcare or fin-tech or e-commerce or any other space" and not even mentioning your level, you say "I'm a director-level product leader with experience in multi-sided marketplaces in e-commerce". Boom!

I know it can be scary to "peg" yourself into a box, but when the market is this noisy, you do want to do just that, so you can have a clear signal to the marketplace that cuts through the noise. If one specific F.I.L. doesn't work, you can try another one later. Just never do multiple F.I.L.s at once - it will confuse you and others.

4. Reach out to your warmest connections, prioritizing people who are employed and who may be connected to a F.I.L opportunity. Plan to reach out to ALL of the ones who’re not going through a crisis like a layoff themselves.

5. Follow up. People are busy and they may not be checking LinkedIn daily. So, you may need to re-ping the ones who haven’t responded in a week or so. Just do it gently. Reply all to the initial message and say "Hey, I wanted to follow up on my message from a week ago. I'd love to re-connect!"

Set the right intention before reaching out

And here's the formula for actually crafting that all-important reach out message. A word of warning: Your intention and the tone of voice here are much more important than what you actually say. Your intention must be to genuinely connect and be of service to the other person, even though there may not be an immediate action to take as a result.

If you have an "agenda" to connect to someone, that agenda will be obvious to the recipient, no matter how hard you try to hide it.

RASA Framework for Reaching Out

The content of the reach-out message needs to follow your intention.

1.Reconnect - Start with saying how excited you're to reconnect and express your surprise that it's been so long since you two have talked. This is also the place to congratulate them on recent achievements they've talked about or mention an update they’ve posted so they know you’re up to speed. (2 sentences)

Example: Hey X, long time no see - I can't believe it's been 2 years since we last talked when we both left company Y. I've been following your updates since you joined company Z and I wanted to congratulate you on getting [achievement they've posted about] - that's super inspiring!

2.Ask them about them - Next, ask how they're doing (at their new job, new role, new city, etc) and inquire after their family or pets if you know something about them. Make sure you're genuinely interested in those updates, so when they come (in a message or over a call), you can pay attention to them and make the other person feel that you genuinely care. More on this in the Advanced Networking article and podcast episode, which will be coming out shortly. (1-2 sentences)

Example: How's [family member 1] and [family members 2 and 3]? I hope they're enjoying the new city and settling in well. Have they found a new swim team to join?

3. Share your situation and F.I.L. - Very briefly, state the facts of your situation and the F.I.L. that you're looking for. It is important you leave all emotion out of it - anything that may make you sound bitter or resentful. (2 sentences)

Example: Things are generally well on my end. I was part of a recent layoff at company A and now I'm in the market looking for a [insert your F.I.L. here].

4. Ask them for help - You have to use your judgment here on the scope of your ask. If you don't have a strong relationship or it's been a while since you've connected, make your ask as soft as possible and only suggest a call. If you know them well and the relationship is strong, you can ask them to hop on a call to catch up. Either way, don't ask for more than 15 minutes! More on this will come in the next article on Advanced Networking. (2-3 sentences)

Example: Let me know if someone comes to mind that may be looking for such a role. I am happy to jump on a quick 15 min call as well - it'll be great to reconnect and catch up face-to-face. Let me know what may work on your end and I look forward to hearing from you!

In the next article, I'll be going deeper into this Strategic Networking approach and walking you through the actual conversation and structure of the 15 minute connection call, as well as how to put a system in place to maintain and grow your strategic networking with minimal effort.