Stop Telling Leaders to Be Resilient: Here's a Better Way.
Maree McPherson OAM
Trusted confidant, mentor and coach to CEOs and Chairs ? Coaching Supervisor - MSCEIT accredited, Oxford Brookes trained ? ex-CEO ? Independent Chair ? Author and Panellist
Stop telling leaders to be resilient. Enough, already.
And if you're a leader defining yourself in this way – maybe you're part of the problem.
Words used to describe leaders are many and varied. People define you as stoic, resilient, sturdy, reliable, and unflappable.
The general rule is that good leaders are not phased by much. They cope with disasters and manage under extreme circumstances.
But let's not paint an unrealistic picture. These traits don't emerge every minute of the day –not every time there's a crisis, like some magical super-power.
Stop defining leaders like this. Leaders are humans – with leadership responsibilities.
People are fatigued, tetchy, and anxious about world affairs and the economy. Your team expects you to find the green shoots and positive stories. They want to feel hopeful.
They are more likely to be quick to anger, denial, frustration, despair, and fatigue –like during the pandemic.
What does that mean for you, trying to hold it all together?
Compassion fatigue, confusion, exhaustion, and more.
You can't get our work done. You tire out. You might feel a false sense of boredom.
You might reinforce negative views about yourself. "What's wrong with me?" "Why can't I get past this?"
Your mind plays over and over on repeat – "cut the crap, and get on with solving the problem at hand".
Traditionally, you've been told that you need to practice:
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All of the above is useful. Don't stop.
I have another suggestion.
Take time out.
Make time for a holiday or go on a leadership retreat simply to THINK – time is what you need right now.
And this is where I add my qualifier for the term resilience.
There's nothing wrong with the word – it's the definition we have bungled.
Resilience isn't about endurance – it's all about how you recharge .
Sustain yourself successfully for whatever is coming next. It is a critical time to practice self-regard and self-care.
Break the monotony.
Take a deep breath and plan your break.
You're welcome.
P.S. True resilience and growth for leaders come from taking the time to recharge and reflect. As a senior executive, pursuing excellence involves not just enduring challenges but also fostering self-care and strategic pauses. Engaging a seasoned confidante can be the catalyst that amplifies your influence and drives transformative results. Embrace the opportunity to partner with a professional who will challenge your perspectives and unlock your potential as a visionary leader. I invite you to book a 20 minute call with me here or reach out via email here.
Leadership Coach | Speaker | Facilitator | EQ Practitioner | Well-being Advocate I Unlocking human potential
3 个月I recently listened to podcast with Simon Sinek and Mike Gervais and they discussed the importance of recovery to sustain high performance. Something that high avhievers do not always intuitively consider. Very relevant point about the need to recover Maree McPherson OAM
Marketing Integrator for High Ticket Coaches
4 个月Absolutely agree, Maree! It's so important to recognize our limits and recharge. Leaders are human too, and taking time for rest and reflection is crucial. Love this perspective! ??
Mentally Healthy Workplaces | Safe and Effective Leaders | Strengths Based Teams | 2 x Author: Transforming Norm & Finding Equilibrium | Speaker | Trainer | Coach.
4 个月Please please please stop telling anyone they “just need to be more resilient”. My position on “resilience” is well known Maree. I prefer people understand the concept of psychological capital and the HERO model to better grasp how environmental and situational factors impact people. Your article is a great reminder of the perils of this word.
Loving applying the development and education of my career as an executive to helping achieve a vision of measurably healthier Gippsland
4 个月I think so often too that some leaders feel the need to seem infallible and unflappable. They don't want their teams to know that they might have struggles in their life, that situations upset them, or they have things going on personally. So they hide those things, keep staff away from their social media, and maintain a polished view of themselves in the workplace. Maybe I'm not of the popular view but I see nothing wrong with being authentic, letting my teams know if things are a little rough right now, etc and letting them see my real self, who and how I really am, and that it's not always polished presence with everything in total control.
Committed to ensuring every moment of care is exceptional
4 个月It was great to read this Maree, just after I booked a private session with a friend at Peninsula Hot Springs for next Monday as part of my spoil me retreat. Luxury accommodation lunches, massages, facials and hot springs all booked. This is my mid year retreat where I get to do nothing and have space to think if I want to or just not even bother think. After a difficult time for 6 weeks dealing with personnel issues which resulted in our 4th dismissal yesterday, it could not have come at a better time. The difficulty I find is I can make tough decisions for the business easily because so many including myself depend on the business' success, but what I have found this week is those decisions sit well with the business side of me, however they evoke emotions in the personal side of me. Time for a retreat!