STOP Self-Sabotage, please!
STOP Self-Sabotage, please!
I needed to run into a North Carolina State Employee Credit Union for an unusual request and as soon as I was done the person on the other side of the counter stated, "I am new, let me ask someone...".
So often we self-sabotage ourselves by diminishing our values, contributions, and skills by limiting our brand and value to tasks and not results/accomplishments. I see this in resumes daily when students focus on the task assigned rather than their skills and accomplishments in completing the task.
How is this self-sabotage? By communicating her newness she drew my attention to her deficit and why she may not be as capable to complete the task. This is a coping mechanism that we do to make others feel comfortable with our possible mistakes (need for validation/avoidance), impending fumbling of a task (negative mindset/fear), and our insecurity (self-preservation/imposter syndrome). This is the same thing college graduates do on interviews when they say, "I do not have any experience, I only have a degree..." In essence, you are saying the experience is what I/you value but I have a degree that I/you do not value as being important for this job.
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The individual on the other side of the counter was speaking correctly about their time in the position, but that does not matter in getting the task complete. The new person had to ask an employee with more years that had to do research and ask another person, so time in the position did not matter. What the person could have drawn my attention to was her ability to problem-solve, resourcefulness, or communication/customer engagement. Just as your education could have helped you gain skills in teamwork, time-management, project management, or research/presentation.
So often we focus on what we can't do in situations and draw attention to our limitations that we miss the plethora of skills we bring. By missing these skills, which I believe we achieve daily, we short-change ourselves and our impact in our current position or towards our future careers. I am writing this because I did not know what to say. But now I do, I should have said, "Your newness does not make you any less brilliant!"
I would love to hear from you on this matter. What do you think?
Assistant Manager | BIS in Hospitality
3 年We do not have a lot signs in our lives that define what kind of human we should be. This is a start
Sr. Production Supervisor at Jabil Healthcare
3 年As a student that has talked with you a few times, I completely agree. You have shown me multiple times that my answers, although acceptable, weren't complete in a way to best show my abilities that would boost my image. The advantage of having someone help you understand how to respond to questions is an extremely important asset.
Accountant
3 年Acknowledging what we bring to the table, definitely changes the game. Great post.
Front-End Web and Application Developer working in Angular and React. Experienced in Web development technologies. Graduated with a BS in Computer Science from the University of North Carolina at Pembroke.
3 年Great article John! Will definitely keep this in mind and pass it on to others.