Stop Saying Um in 6 Steps

Clients ask me all the time, “How do I get rid of my ums? Why do they care? We all use a few ums. I certainly do. But when you consistently say um and ah it can have negative effects.

I heard an Ivy League professor give a lecture online. It was an interesting topic except that he continually punctuated his talk with um. I lost interest.

Here’s the negative impact of using too many ums.

Loss of credibility. The audience expects a credentialed speaker to be effective. Too many ums can make a seasoned speaker sound like an amateur.

Loss of attention. People will listen for just so long before they get bored and tune out.

Loss of message. If the audience checks out mentally, your message doesn’t get through. They lose information and you lose influence.

The good news is you can change all that. You’re not sentenced to a life of vocal tics. Here is a roadmap for eliminating ums.

Awareness. Why do people keep repeating the same habits and patterns? Because they lack self awareness. Change happens once people hear themselves. When I echo back a non-word or filler, clients will ask “Did I just say um?” They don’t hear it!!! Record yourself and tally the number of ums in your 1 to 3 minute talk. Now you have a baseline.

Negative practice. Next, choose a topic and deliberately say a lot of ums. Why? The natural inclination is to avoid saying um and that creates more hesitations, stops and starts, and nervousness. Don’t resist. Say as many ums as you can.

Look for patterns. Identify the types of fillers or nonwords you use. Is it um, ah, you know, okay like, basically? Some people start every sentence with um. If that’s you, cancel the sentence. Stop, count to three and say it again without an um. Do you say um right before a difficult word? If that’s your pattern, during your rehearsal, substitute a simpler word

Master the pause. Practice the same topic but this time, stop and pause. Why is it so hard to pause? Most people are afraid of silence. When you finish a sentence come to a complete stop and don’t say anything. Allow for a silence. Exaggerate the silence. It takes practice to tolerate silence. Don’t speak until you can start the next sentence without saying um. Remember, the power is in the pause.

Rehearse. After working with thousands of presenters, I’ve seen a decrease in ums after rehearsals. The more you practice and the more you know your message, the more fluent you’ll become.

Accountability. Changing behavior requires continual practice and monitoring. Find an accountability partner or hire a coach. They can tally the number of ums during your meetings and presentations. Instead of guessing you’ll have real time data.

Slipping up with an occasional filler or nonword in your presentations will barely be noticeable. But if your audience starts counting them, that’s an issue. Practice these 6 steps and you’ll be fluent in no time. For more tips, read Knockout Presentations.

My presentations, training and coaching are available virtually. It’s easy to find me to discuss your needs. Email [email protected]. DM me at twitter @speakingpro. Or subscribe to https://www.youtube.com/dianediresta

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Tagged: um, filler words, publicspeaking

This article appeared in www.diresta.com/blog. 2/2021