Stop Making New Year's Resolutions

It is that time of year where we all stop and reflect on the year that was and the year ahead. For years I would sit there and make resolutions to myself – stop drinking so much, don’t eat junk food, lose 5 kilos, work out 5 times a week. Every year I would say to myself, "this year things will be different", but not surprisingly, I would usually fail as soon as the clock would strike 12 on the 1st of January and by the following day, I had forgotten everything I had pledged to myself. It is safe to say, I no longer partake in making new year's resolutions - they just don't work for me. See, it is summer in Australia and a ridiculous time to start implementing restrictions on your life, especially when you are going cold turkey or don't have a game plan.

Overhauling your entire life is never an easy task, yet people everywhere around the globe will start crazy fad diets, vow to sign up to gym membership, say they will stop smoking or drinking, without any real strategies in place. They expect everything to change without changing themselves or their situation. Usually as the new year is getting started, I’m already breaking my resolutions and come the next day, I have a hangover that needs about a week to recover from and seems to only be fixed with a lot of pizza. As you can see, it is a lost cause.

Making huge changes like these is not as simple as saying you are not going to do something anymore. Usually there are habits that need to be broken and deep seeded beliefs and attitudes that need to be shifted. It is not to say you can't change, you absolutely can and I actually did. You must bear in mind though, if you want to change, it is something you need to work on everyday because there is a lot of work that is involved. It's about creating new habits and letting go of old ones. If you want to make changes, then my advice is to start today and not on a day just because it happens to read as 1/1.

There is something I believe you should do on the 1st of January and something I do every year, and that is setting goals. You might be thinking, okay what's the difference? Aren't goals and resolutions the same thing? Well no, they are not. To me resolutions are a bunch of things you can’t do anymore and place impossible restrictions on yourself, whereas I see goals as something to be achieved over the course of the year. For example, my goals for 2018 were simple, easily achievable - kind of like a bucket list of all the things I wanted to do. They included: doing tennis lessons, going on a yoga retreat, doing a meditation class and writing and publishing an article. I achieved almost every single goal on my list because they were simple, one step goals. I did several one-on-one tennis coaching sessions and now I can play tennis. I did a yoga retreat earlier this year and from that time I actually started taking up yoga daily and because of my new active lifestyle I hardly drink anymore and my diet is super healthy. I also did a meditation class and since then I have downloaded an app where I do meditation daily, I have now meditated for 60 consecutive days. I wrote and published my first article earlier this year and I now have written my 13th one.

When I wrote these goals down I didn't have the intention to change my lifestyle completely, however because I did try new things and step out of my comfort zone, I changed and grew as a person. I have found doing this has opened up so many amazing opportunities and as a result has changed my life. They have indirectly made me quit drinking, live a healthier lifestyle, get fit, find my passion for writing and even lose weight. Looking back, 2018 was one of the most successful years of my life. Not only did I achieve a lot, but I also am the most happiest and at peace I have ever been in my life. I am living my life as authentically as possible, doing things I have never done before. This year was about finding meaning and purpose, something that I feel that I am on the way to achieving through writing, prioritizing my health and enjoying life.

I hope this article has inspired you to stop and contemplate the year ahead. What goals do you wish to tick off your list in 2019? In order to keep me accountable, I have made my goals public. Here are some goals I plan to achieve in 2019:

• Speaking in front of an audience

When I was younger, I loved public speaking. I loved writing speeches and I loved delivering them even more. I don't really remember the last time I stood in front of an audience and spoke, but I have a strong desire to do this again. My goal is to have a speaking engagement in front of an audience.

• Learn to Horse Ride

This is something I have always wanted to learn. This year I learnt how to play tennis, which I absolutely loved and will continue next year. So I want to see if I like horse riding too. I am a lot more active these days and enjoy learning new things so horse riding seems like a perfect thing to start learning.

• Complete a run

I have never been fit enough to run a race. I feel that at this stage of my life this is probably the fittest I have ever been and can probably do this now. My goal is to run in the "City to Surf" held in Sydney every year in August. I had written this as my goal last year for 2018, however I did not achieve this goal because I was in Europe at the time. 2019 looks like the year I will finally complete this.

• Volunteer for a charity

I had done a lot of charity work in my youth and as an adult donated money to charity, but I haven't actively done charity work in recent years. It is always such a beautiful feeling to give back so I am excited to get involved and help out in any way I can.

• Do a cooking course

This year I completely changed my diet as a result of being diagnosed with an autoimmune disease. I was on an elimination diet and cut a lot of things out, so now I hardy eat out and I do a lot more cooking at home. Unfortunately I don't have many recipes and would love some inspiration to continue to cook healthy, nutritious foods.

• Write the first chapter of my book

My long-term goal is to write and publish a book. At this stage I have no idea what I want to write about but I have a deep desire to be published one day. Having said that, I would love to say my goal for the year is to write a complete book, however this seems way too overwhelming. I feel that writing a chapter is more realistic and something I know I can achieve within the year. I'm hoping it will be the case as with my yoga, once I start I can't stop. Who knows, I may have a complete book by the end of the year, but at the very least I will have a chapter and that's more than what I have now.

Good luck, enjoy writing your goals and happy New Year!

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