Stop Making Lists and Go With the Flow

As you know, I love making lists. I make them for anything that comes up in my day or in my life. I’m so busy making sure that I follow my roadmap that sometimes I feel like I’m no longer living in the moment.

And during the COVID-19 pandemic, living in the moment is a really important way to relieve stress. You have to do a little planning to create the circumstances for relaxation, but it’s so important to make time for joy.

I was probably drawn to Cass McCrory, my website designer and marketing strategist, because she also loves planning and lists. She is an efficient worker with a bit of a type-A personality like me. We both feel most comfortable when every second of our day is planned. 

In a podcast on The Lively Show, Cass explained how her obsession with planning was stopping her from enjoying her own life. So she set about changing her ways to give herself more time to just go with the flow.

This is a valuable topic to think about during the pandemic. Being too caught up in list-making and planning can make you more stressed out during an already stressful time. I know - I’m breaking my own rules here but hear me out for a minute.

I get it — you might feel like the only way to have some control over your life is to plan every last thing. (I do!) While being diligent about planning ways to stay safe and healthy is obviously important, you can also create the possibility for spontaneity and fun.

Here are some little unplanned experiments for you to try to get more out of your free time:

____________________

BRAND NEW: Want to learn more about how to adjust your office setup to working remotely? Check out my new LinkedIn Learning course, Organizing Your Remote Office for Maximum Productivity. Click here for access!

____________________

Do something new in your own town

When she reached a breaking point, pre-COVID-19, Cass decided to have one weekend where nothing was planned. So she packed her husband, kids and dogs into the car and went to a local festival. She ended up having the best time and it made her see her town in a whole new light.

This can be more complicated during COVID-19, but you can still make it happen. Try taking a walk in a new neighborhood or visiting a local park you’ve never been to. My husband did this as we quarantined in New York City. We would pick a new direction to walk in and stumbled upon some great parks and beautiful buildings we would have otherwise never visited. When we plan all the time, we only see the things we allow ourselves to see. By leaving some room to experiment we can discover things we didn’t even know were there.

Have plans, just don’t iron out the details

Cass realized that the reason she was able to have fun at the festival was because she had planned the day out to a certain extent, but had left the rest up to chance. So you don’t have to give up your planning ways altogether. This flexibility allowed her to live in the moment.

She stopped worrying about crossing off specific items on her list, like taking the kids to a specific activity or having lunch at a specific time, and just let them have fun. We have so much stress in our lives already — there’s no need to add to it with the pressure to stick to our own complex plans.

Again, COVID-19 can throw a wrench in this, since sometimes you need to think about the details in order to make sure you’re able to social distance. But it can still work!

Try going to a big park where you’ll be able to stay six feet away from other people. You can bring a book, a picnic, and a frisbee and just see what happens. No need to plan every detail or decide how long you’ll stay in advance. Plus there’s ways to create virtual vacations and the possibilities are endless! 

Work harder, not longer – Going with the flow really worked for both Cass and her family, so she concentrated on trying to give herself more ‘flow’ time. Cass realized that despite running her own business and being in charge of her schedule, she was still working long, unsociable hours.

We all have this false belief that the longer we work on something the more we must care about it, but that’s not true. There’s no point in drawing something out for the sake of your own ego. 

Cass cut down her working hours to 28-hour weeks to make sure she had time for her friends and family. We don’t all have the luxury of choosing our own hours, but we can still apply this principle in our lives. Learning how to say no is an important way to empower yourself and make sure your work is serving your goals.  

If you’re working from home, you might be able to build in more flexibility in your schedule. I recently released my LinkedIn Learning course on setting up a productive remote office, so I’m full of tips to help you get the most out of working from home. Once you create a remote office that works for you, you can maximize your productivity to have more free time. 

What feels good now? – Cass asks herself this question multiple times. When she has free time, she may look at her to-do list and choose something from there, or she’ll decide to do something else. But she gets to pick and that’s empowering. Sometimes she picks reading a book or calling a friend or runs to Home Depot. It’s all about what strikes her fancy at the moment. 

Now, when so many things we used to do to relax are dangerous and off-limits, it’s especially important to indulge yourself when you think of something safe that will make you feel good. It could be as small as lighting a delicious-smelling candle you’ve been saving or starting a new book by your favorite author.

We’re living in an unusual time, and the urge to plan has probably gotten stronger for a lot of people. If your lists are adding to your stress rather than helping you feel like you’ve got things under control, try rethinking your approach. You have to intentionally set yourself up to live in the moment. 

The routine shake-up caused by COVID-19 can actually be a way for you to consider what’s really important to you. If putting these ideas into practice is working for you right now, you might want to start considering how you can keep creating opportunities for flow and flexibility in your life after things start going back to normal. 

Make a list of all the things you love to do that make you happy. For me it’s watching episodes of Rick Steves Europe on weekends to be transported to a far-off land. I never know where I’m going! 

Do you have tips for safely creating joy and spontaneity right now? I’d love to hear about them in the comments section. 

NEW COURSE: Want to learn more about how to adjust to working remotely? You can check out my new LinkedIn Learning course, Organizing Your Remote Office for Maximum Productivity. Click here for access!