Stop Making Exceptions for Yourself

Stop Making Exceptions for Yourself

I didn’t want to write this article for today.

I was of town with friends last week (a last hurrah before I start 75 Hard again—more details on that below) and told myself, “what does it matter if I skip a week?”

The answer is: it matters a lot.

In June, I promised myself that I would write these posts every week for a minimum of one year to get in the habit of writing more consistently.

Would readers notice if I skipped a week? Maybe, maybe not.

Would they care? Maybe, maybe not.?

But I would know.

Skipping is a decision that provides short-term gain while teaching my brain that it’s ok to break the promises I make to myself.

Stop making exceptions

In his book Golden Son, Pierce Brown said “You will fall to ruin because you believe that exceptions to the rule make new rules.”

Here’s what I take this to mean:

Your brain can convince you that ANYTHING is a good idea.

Don’t have time to go to the meeting you said you’d attend? Just skip it.

Didn’t squeeze in that workout you were going to do today? Oh well, do it tomorrow.

Something you said you’d complete fell to the bottom of your priority list and it didn’t get done? There’s always next week.

Once you start making exceptions like this for yourself, the exception can become the rule.

And that new rule often has the power to derail everything you’ve worked for.

It can make you appear unreliable to others and worst of all, to yourself. Who can we rely on if we can’t even rely on ourselves to follow through?

I believe strongly that following through—actually doing the things you say you’ll do—is one of the most underrated keys to success.

What is 75 Hard?

‘Exceptions’ is the perfect topic for this week as I begin my 75 Hard journey.

My husband and I completed this challenge last year in late summer/fall, and I’m telling you it’s the reason I was able to stay sane during so many months of being stuck at home during this pandemic.

DISCLAIMER before I describe the challenge—this is not for everyone. That said, I love stuff like this and I find that I need to make myself rules (like no alcohol or work out every day) or I can slip. Read on if you think it might be for you, too.

75 Hard is a mental toughness challenge.

It’s 75 days of learning to be disciplined and there are absolutely NO EXCEPTIONS allowed. (If you make an exception even one day, you start the challenge over.)

For 75 days, you must:

Follow a diet of your choosing. I hate the word diet and have refused to ever “go on a diet”—that’s still true. Since I eat pretty healthy, I’m going to reduce my dairy and white carb intake even further for 75 days.

Work out twice a day for 45 minutes each. One workout must be outside. Last year I did yoga and walked outside, then did my typical workout schedule inside including cycling, lifting, and walking on my treadmill. I plan to repeat it this year.

Consume ZERO alcohol and ZERO cheat meals. For me, no cheat meals is easy, but no alcohol is hard in social situations. In good ole Wisconsin, gatherings and networking always involve drinks flowing, and there can be a lot of social pressure when you abstain. That said, there will probably be less socializing and thus less social pressure as COVID continues to rear its ugly head.

As alcoholism is genetic and found in quite a few places in my family, I’m looking forward to this opportunity to check my relationship with alcohol.

The other three rules are:

  • Drink a gallon of water a day
  • Take a progress picture daily
  • Read at least 10 pages of a book every day

The 75 Hard challenge is so interesting because it’s not a diet plan or a workout challenge with a goal of losing fat, gaining muscle, etc. Instead, it’s a challenge for your mind (to stay consistent and disciplined—no exceptions!) with the side-benefit of massively changing your body at the same time.

The final word on exceptions

The next time you want to make an exception, ask yourself these questions:

Does this exception benefit me in the short term, or the long run?

Is there any way I can follow through on my commitments?

Finally, how can I prevent situations where I need/want to make exceptions in the future?

Many (many, many) people do not have the discipline to do the things they say they’re going to do; by simply keeping your promises to others and yourself, you can stand apart from the crowd.

By the way...

Anyone interested in joining me on the 75 Hard journey? It’s not for everyone, but if it’s for you, leave a comment and we can cheer each other on.

Dominic Dimarantino

Bookkeeping Professional for Small and Medium Businesses ◆Preparing tax returns ◆Invoicing ◆Maintaining accounts receivable and accounts payable ◆Reconciling financial statements with bank statements

3 年

I enjoyed reading your article, Jackie. Not giving exceptions is an awesome idea to max out productivity and plainly follow through with commitments already set. I think this article of yours deserves its own academic study.

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Ryan Calton

Fractional and Virtual CFO | Growth Strategy | M&A | Finance | Operations | CPA

3 年

No exceptions! Let's do this Jackie. It helps to have an accountability partner.

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Brian Dooreck, MD

Board-Certified Gastroenterologist & Private Healthcare Navigator | High-Touch Patient Advocacy for Family Offices, HNWIs, RIAs, Private Households, Individuals, C-Suites

3 年

Jackie Hermes Great point on accountability. Brian Dooreck MD | Gastroenterology | Gut Health ? Patient Advocacy with Navigation ? Life Balance | @dr.dooreck

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Ravi Rajani

I'll teach you and your team how to communicate with influence so you can build trusted relationships that boost sales growth and team performance | Keynote Speaker | Coach | Consultant

3 年

Great read! Yesss self-discipline goes a long way ??

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