STOP IT!

Bob Newhart, the late iconic US comedian, once performed a brilliant comedy sketch where he played a therapist with a rather unconventional method. In the sketch, his patient shares her fear of being buried alive, describing the anxiety and distress this thought causes her. Bob’s character listens intently, empathizes, and then delivers his groundbreaking solution: “I have two words for you that will cure you completely.”

The patient, intrigued and eager to be freed from her suffering, grabs her notebook, ready to jot down this life-changing advice. But Bob insists a notebook won’t be necessary for just two words. He then asks, “Are you ready?”

“Yes,” she replies.

“Here they are two words… Stop it. STOP IT.” And he spells it out.

You can imagine her surprise and frustration. “How can I just stop it?” she asks, bewildered. Bob, however, remains firm that this is the cure. The sketch continues for a few more minutes, hilariously exploring the absurdity of his "advice."

But as funny as it is, the wisdom behind it stays with me. Whenever my thinking spirals out of control, I find myself reflecting on this sketch. Could it really be as simple as that? Let’s explore this a little more deeply.

What is anxiety, really?

Take a moment to examine it in your direct experience. When anxiety arises, what do you notice? Likely, you’ll find anxious thoughts, maybe some uncomfortable feelings or bodily sensations, or even vivid mental images of your worst fears. Perhaps your heart races, your body tenses, and everything about the experience feels real, urgent and something you need to get rid of.

But rather than turn away, pause for a moment. What is it, really? Look deeper. Is it as real as it seems, or is it a combination of perceptions appearing in your mind and body? If you’re perceiving these thoughts and sensations, are they who you are—or are you the one perceiving them?

The Perceiver and the Perceived

Here’s where the shift happens: If you are the one aware of these thoughts, feelings, and sensations, then you are not those things. You are the awareness of them. Thoughts come and go. Sensations rise and fall. Feelings are transient. But the awareness—the perceiver—remains constant, ever-present, and unchanging.

Once you glimpse this truth, the idea of saying “Stop it” to the spiraling thoughts or feelings makes more sense. You’re not denying the experience; you’re waking up to the fact that you are not the experience itself. You are the awareness in which it arises.

Practical Application in Work and Life

So how can this understanding apply to our work lives? Imagine facing a challenging situation—a stressful deadline, a difficult conversation, or a fear of failure. Anxiety might start to bubble up, and with it, the familiar cascade of thoughts and sensations. In that moment, pause and notice: What is happening? What are you experiencing? Are you the racing thoughts, or are you the one observing them?

This shift in perspective creates space. From that space, you can remind yourself: “Stop it.” Not as a forceful denial or technique to distract from the experience, but as a gentle acknowledgment that you are not your transient thoughts and feelings. You are the awareness in which they unfold.

When you operate from this place of awareness, you gain clarity, calm, and a greater capacity to respond rather than react. It’s a practice that takes time, but even small glimpses of this truth can transform the way you experience anxiety—and life.

Aroha

Judith