Stop comparing and start identifying Your Unique Value Proposition

I have been thinking about confidence.?In many coaching sessions with clients, confidence, self-belief and a lack of conviction appear as identified barriers to reaching the next level, excelling at the current level, and performing at the level required now.

The reasons why can be many and varied.?Often stemming from our formative years, we have received messages of not being good enough, smart enough, or quick enough.?As we progress into adolescents and adulthood, it’s often shame associated with an embarrassing event or incident that stays with us.?Maybe someone delivered feedback to us in an ineffective and inappropriate way.?Maybe we felt shamed in front of colleagues or clients.?Whatever the reason is, it has the ability to really put a dent in our confidence and have us questioning ourselves and our value.

When these types of issues arise, I like to use the theory of YUVP, also known as, “Your Unique Value Proposition”.?Over thousands of conversations throughout my life, starting way back when I mentored students at school as a school leader, through to now, in my fourth decade, I have realised that we can suffer an ailment called comparititus.?I think I made that one up too.?Comparititus is the constant measuring up of ourselves against others.?They have a great job, why don’t I have a great job??I must not be as smart.?They have a fantastic house, how come I don’t??I am just not successful.?I need to get another qualification, I need to build better networks, I need to run faster, I need to jump higher etc.?I think you get where I’m going.?But in the midst of comparititus, we forget the silver bullet.?That silver bullet is that we all have a unique value proposition that is not able to be replicated by any other being on this planet.?It is uniquely yours.?You were born with it.?No one else was.?They have their own of course, but it’s not yours, and you don’t have theirs. Like your fingerprint, it is unique to you.

If we focus on what we have, that is uniquely ours, rather than what we don’t, we can better play to our strengths.?And we know how important it is.???To focus on your strengths, you need to know that they are there.?Sometimes we get so out of touch as we constantly compare ourselves to others, that we forget what our strengths are.?A period of self-evaluation, and reflection is the cure for this first stage.?Then you can move on to the second stage which is about using your strengths as “key signature strengths”. What can I use my strengths for??What do I enjoy? What makes me feel most alive, free, elevated, and valued??And finally, you create your unique value proposition.?It can be a statement, a graphic, a logo, or whatever means something to you.?Place it somewhere where you see it every day, multiple times a day.?This is about reinforcing what you know to be true, but what is easily forgotten as it becomes clouded in comparititusness.

If we don’t believe in ourselves, others won’t believe in us either.?Conviction and self-belief are the treatments for comparititus.?Take it many times daily.?

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Rita Cincotta writes, mentors, and speaks on individual and team performance, leadership development, resilience and new ways of working. She works with organisations to develop human-centred solutions that help people and businesses to thrive.

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