STOP BULLYING AT WORK
Carmen López Hernández
CEO at Carmen López | LEADERSHIP & STRESS EXPERT: Do you want to succeed as a leader? Do you need to reduce your stress?| PSYCHOLOGIST | Executive Psychologist | Human Resources Consultant?? German-English-Spanish.
Linda Shallcross, director of Workplace Mobbing Australia, defines mobbing as ?a deliberate attempt to force a person out of their workplace by humiliation, general harassment, emotional abuse, or terror“
Conflict at work is normally about quantifiable data, a difference of opinion, or competing interests and options. These situations can be uncomfortable, but sometimes they are necessary for a company to move forward.
Mobbing, on the other hand, is not directed to facts or data, but to your character. In fact, mobbing is suffered in many cases by high performers that threaten a mediocre status quo.
It starts with some vague criticism about your punctuality, lack of willingness to collaborate, some unimportant details in your work, or some personality traits. Mobbing maximizes your negatives and ignores all your positives.
The bully continues trying to isolate you and getting other workers and management against you. Here is where the bully gets a mob to play along.
You feel:
- Isolated.
- Depressed.
- Anxious.
- Edgy.
- Powerless.
- Your focus plummets.
- You question your own value.
This is exactly what the bully wants: For you to make mistakes, to get angry, and to be unfocused, so they can give proof of your inability to work. Their goal is to ruin your reputation.
This is what you need to do to feel empowered and in control again:
- Start a diary with all the incidents that you are suffering. Write down dates, people, words, actions, behaviors, and how you feel. This will be your red notebook.
- Start a diary with all the work you do and your successes. This will be your white notebook.
These two notebooks will help you understand that you have value and aren’t doing anything wrong. If the situation escalates it can help as proof.
- Don’t be isolated. Look for peer support inside your organization. If you cannot get it, look for your friends’ and family's support outside.
- If you can, talk to your boss or Human Resources to stop the bully. Regrettably, they sometimes don’t want to deal with the problem. Or worse, they are part of the problem. If this is your case, go to point 5.
- Get an external psychologist and a lawyer. They will evaluate the situation and protect your mental health and your rights. They will give you strategies and options to overcome mobbing.
If you feel relieved and empowered by this text, it’s possible that you are suffering mobbing. Please start looking for help.
Carmen Lopez
Global citizen dedicated to the sustainable development of the energy, mining, and oil industries, founder of SERTECPET, a company with high standards based on innovation and best practices.
2 年Very good comments dear Carmen,
Director comercial en Arcana Tiles (Grupo Vives)
2 年Nice article Carmen López Hernández. It′s a pity but that happens almost in all the companies. That′s part of human being...but should be fight against every single day.
Empowering diverse technical minds & teams in navigating VUCA landscape for sustainable business growth
2 年Very important topic and thank you for rising this. Remains still unnoticed in particular in conservative industries, or what may come as a surprise, is touching also senior staff members (as victims). Better channelled energy would lead to higher efficiencies at work, but the problem must be noticed and addressed first.
CEO at Carmen López | LEADERSHIP & STRESS EXPERT: Do you want to succeed as a leader? Do you need to reduce your stress?| PSYCHOLOGIST | Executive Psychologist | Human Resources Consultant?? German-English-Spanish.
2 年Thank you Jaber, Sid, Gesue, Giancarlo. Best Regards, Carmen
CEO at Carmen López | LEADERSHIP & STRESS EXPERT: Do you want to succeed as a leader? Do you need to reduce your stress?| PSYCHOLOGIST | Executive Psychologist | Human Resources Consultant?? German-English-Spanish.
2 年Hi Pius und Pedro, I'm glad you like this article. Best Regards, Carmen ??