Stop Being so Realistic to Win in Life

We frequently hear statements like "Be realistic," "Set achievable goals," and "Don't aim too high" in today's environment. Though well-meaning, such counsel frequently stifles our potential. Although it is advised that we should approach every aspect of life with logic, reason, and practicality, doing so may actually impede our development, accomplishments, and general success. Occasionally, our logical thoughts erect imperceptible barriers and constraints that hinder us from reaching our full potential.

The concept of "being realistic" is not inherently wrong. In fact, it's necessary in certain situations. For instance, you wouldn't want to challenge a bear to a fight or attempt to fly like a bird—some things are simply beyond human capability. But when it comes to our ambitions, dreams, and goals, the lines between what is possible and impossible are often drawn by our own minds, not by actual limitations. This is where we often falter. Our inner dialogue says things like, "This is too hard," "That goal is unrealistic," or "What will others think?" But is this our true self-speaking, or is it the voice of fear and anxiety?

The Rational Mind: Friend or Foe? ~

As humans, our brains have evolved over millennia to prioritize survival above all else. From the time of early humans, fear and anxiety were essential tools to ensure our survival. These emotions kept us cautious, alert, and ready to respond to potential threats in our environment. But as society has evolved from the days of hunting and gathering to a modern world of technology, innovation, and unprecedented opportunity, our minds haven’t entirely caught up. That "spider sense" of danger is still active, often whispering—or shouting—warnings even when there's no real threat.

While this fear-based thinking was useful in avoiding predators or dangerous situations in the past, it now manifests as self-doubt, fear of failure, or concern over societal judgment. In modern times, it leads to thoughts like, "I'm not good enough," "What if I fail?" or "People will laugh at me." As a result, we hold ourselves back from pursuing our goals, and worse, we convince ourselves that our ambitions are impractical or unrealistic.

But here’s the hard truth: our rational mind, governed by fear and past experiences, isn't always the best guide for what we can achieve in life. It tells us to play it safe, stay within the lines, and avoid discomfort. Yet, success in life doesn’t come from staying comfortable. It comes from pushing boundaries, challenging the status quo, and daring to dream beyond what seems "realistic."

The Trap of “Realism ~

Consider some of the greatest achievements in human history—landing on the moon, creating the internet, or even something as commonplace as inventing the airplane. At the time, each of these endeavors was considered wildly unrealistic. But none of these breakthroughs would have been possible if the individuals involved had adhered to the conventional wisdom of their time. What if the Wright brothers had decided that human flight wasn’t realistic? What if the pioneers of the space race had decided that the moon was simply too far out of reach?

The danger in being overly realistic is that we begin to impose limitations on ourselves that aren't actually there. We create a box in which we operate, and any idea or ambition that lies outside of that box becomes immediately discarded. We tell ourselves that we’re being “practical” or “logical,” but in reality, we’re simply being guided by our own insecurities and fears.

Most of the time, it’s not our actual abilities or potential that stop us, but the beliefs we hold about what’s possible. These beliefs are often shaped by past experiences, societal expectations, or the opinions of others. If you constantly tell yourself that your dreams are unrealistic, you’ll start to believe it, and eventually, you’ll act accordingly.

Breaking Free of Limiting Beliefs ~

So how do we break free from these self-imposed limitations? The first step is recognizing that your rational mind, while valuable in many aspects of life, isn’t always the best judge of your potential. It’s essential to develop the ability to separate genuine, productive thoughts from those based on fear and anxiety. You can acknowledge your fears without allowing them to control your decisions.

Think of fear and anxiety as background noise. They're there, but they don’t have to be the main soundtrack of your life. You have the power to turn down the volume and focus on what truly matters—your goals, your dreams, and your potential. The key is not to eliminate fear but to acknowledge it and choose to move forward in spite of it.

Our ancestors accidentally discovered fire and learned how to harness it. That moment changed the course of human history. But imagine if they had been too scared of getting burned to even try. Similarly, today, the breakthroughs in technology, science, and human achievement all stem from individuals who chose not to listen to the voice of fear or practicality.

The world has changed, and while the primal instincts of fear and danger still exist in all of us, we now have the ability to consciously decide whether or not to listen to them. Just because something feels scary or impossible doesn’t mean it is. More often than not, the most significant accomplishments lie just beyond the boundaries of what we think is achievable.

Harnessing Your Potential ~

The people who achieve greatness in life are not necessarily the most talented, the smartest, or even the hardest-working. They are often the ones who refuse to let the concept of "realism" limit their thinking. They dare to dream beyond what’s commonly accepted and are willing to take risks, face failure, and keep pushing forward despite the odds.

When you find yourself questioning whether something is possible, ask yourself this: Are you basing that judgment on your actual capabilities, or are you letting fear and doubt cloud your perception? The more you train yourself to question those limiting beliefs, the more you’ll find that many of the barriers you thought were insurmountable are simply illusions.

The Path Forward ~

In the end, practicality has little to do with your capabilities and potential. What you are capable of achieving is far greater than what your rational mind might lead you to believe. While it's important to acknowledge fear and anxiety for what they are—evolutionary tools for survival—they do not have to dictate the course of your life.

You can choose to rise above the limiting thoughts and self-doubt that keep you from reaching your full potential. You can choose to embrace the discomfort of pursuing your dreams, knowing that greatness lies on the other side of fear.

So, the next time someone tells you to "be realistic," smile and remember that realism is often just another word for limitation. To win in life, sometimes you need to stop being realistic and start being bold. The world wasn’t changed by people who played it safe—it was changed by those who dared to dream.

~ Manav Thakur