The Stifled Cry: A Mother's Choice and the Price of Education

Trigger Warning: This post discusses sexual assault

Chidinma wasn't supposed to be home yet. It was far too early for the holidays, and a knot of worry tightened in her mother's stomach as Chidinma walked through the door, tears glistening on her cheeks.

Her mother's question hung heavy in the air. "What happened, Nne?" (Igbo for "What's wrong, my dear?")

In a choked sob, the horrifying truth spilled out. Chidinma, a student at a well-known college of education, had been sexually assaulted by a male lecturer, Dr Okoronkwo. He'd summoned her to his office, a supposed meeting about her grades, only to turn it into a nightmare. Despite her desperate resistance, the lecturer had groped her. She'd escaped, shaken and terrified, but the fear lingered – the fear that her grades, her entire academic future, were now at the mercy of this predator.

Chidinma, with a flicker of hope, proposed reaching out to a support organization specializing in sexual and gender-based violence (SGBV). Her mother's reaction, however, was a resounding "Tufia-kwa!" (Igbo for "God forbid!"). Sharing such a personal matter with strangers was unthinkable.

"But mummy," Chidinma pleaded, "they are professionals. They can help, confidentially."

"Mechionu!" (Igbo for "Shut up!") her mother retorted. "What would people say? Don't you understand the stigma I already face as a single mother? Don't make it worse!"

Chidinma's heart sank. This wasn't the support she had yearned for. The culture of silence, heavy and suffocating, descended once more.

Chidinma's story, sadly, is not unique. Many survivors, even after mustering the courage to report, find their efforts thwarted by their own families, unwilling to face the social stigma attached to sexual harassment or assault.

The path to healing and justice starts with a simple yet powerful act: speaking up. Parents have a crucial role to play in supporting their children and encouraging them to report sexual harassment and assault, particularly to organisations such as Gender Mobile Initiative .

Let's break the silence together. Let's create a world where survivors are heard, believed, and supported.

You are not alone. There is help. There is hope.

#SAAM #sexualharassment #sexualassault #sexualviolence #SexualAssaultAwarenessMonth #SayNoToSexForGrades