Stick your ego. I want empathy.

I was recently asked to give a speech at a reception at Edinburgh Castle, by my dear friend & talented friend Omar Shaikh , and the wonderful team at Global Ethical Finance Initiative (GEFI) . Apart from being slightly terrified at what on earth I would say to a room full of terribly smart people, I was also equally excited to go off script a little. A few people surprisingly and very kindly asked me for the transcript after so, given it’s out of context from the night in question, I’ve edited it a bit and thought I’d share here in the hope it might resonate.?It also goes some way in explaining why, when I've been asked by a few journalists to respond to the sensationalist speeches and clickbait headlines, I've chosen not to further fuel the need for attention.

We hear so much today about the professional tensions of what to do and how to do what we need to do. The industrial and financial world that we live in and the challenges we need to address are clear. The intellectual arguments of how and how not to are widely discussed and dissected time and time again. Sometimes in the pursuit of the most noble of causes – progress, but often, I fear, in the pursuit of self-aggrandisement. That overwhelming human need to be heard can lead to the relentless chasing of recognition.

The truth is we all know what we need to do. But are we ready to do what we need to do? Has fear taken such a strong hold that we have become paralysed into inaction, into resignation to a fate not yet written, or into denialism and contrarianism? Are we watching our own demise believing, somehow, someone else will fix it for us whilst we take the opportunity for 5 minutes of fame or infamy.

In an attempt to outsmart each other, out argue each other, and out compete each other, we run with clickbait headlines and speeches. Nothing ever gets solved when ego is in the driving seat. Ego is fear, and fear informs so much of the discourse today in society, in business, in life.

The need for radical collaboration has never been clearer, or, in some instances, demonstrated so beautifully by some of the key actors in society and in business. Partnership brings progress. But what we don’t do so well, and what we aren’t leaning into, is the parallel need for radical empathy. How do we truly understand each other - the people we work with, and sometimes feel we work against? How do we walk in their shoes such that collaboration becomes easier, anchored by a deep understanding of who we truly are? How do we accept their truth even when it runs so counter to our own? How do we learn to stop invalidating their truth and embrace it rather than shouting about our own? In other words, how do we really partner for change and resign fear to the back seat, or preferably, the boot?

Let me pose a simple question. As you look out at whatever view you have, urban or rural, and you think about the lives that have been led there, the people who came before you, can you imagine how they would feel about where we are now? Our early ancestors, who feel as far from us now as the progress we so sorely need, could not conceive of the changes that have flooded through the intervening time. ?

We've made major strides and advances in our own capabilities, we've walked on the moon and been to the bottom of the ocean, we've learned more, about ourselves, each other and everything, we've connected more and broken down barriers, and we've innovated.

This last century has seen extraordinary advances in technology, the development of modern-day capitalism and Love Island. All three have encouraged us to speed up, to consume more, and, arguably, to relate less. We are now poorer, unhappier and more worried than we've ever been. Introduce media, and the rise of fake news, misinformation, and the relentless coverage of the damage we have done to this planet, and, arguably, ourselves, it's hard to imagine our ancestors feeling anything but deep dismay as they desperately search for the pause button. Would they be able to radically empathise with us? Will our children and our grandchildren be able to?

So, I come back to the question I'd like to ask. It’s a question world leading climate psychologist Renee Lertzman, PhD asks us. How are you feeling? How are you really feeling?

Are you tired of the constant swing state between outrage and optimism, hope and despair, fight or flight? Do you feel something is not quite right one minute and seemingly fine the next??Have you ever thought you've done enough and it's time to pass the baton on? Do you just wish that everything was ok? Do you feel alone? ?

Climate psychologists often talk about this environmental induced polarity as a form of PTSD. One, Glenn Albrecht, coined the phrase 'solastaglia', the deep sense of loss (nostalgia) for the state of peace we felt when our home was intact (solace).

So, how do we tackle this distress? Community.

The words derives from the Latin commūnitās, meaning “joint possession or use”, which is in turn derived from communis, which means "common, public, shared by all or many”. Community is our superpower. It is how we leverage each other’s strengths and unite to achieve greatness in the face of adversity, and in celebration of goodness and progress. It is how we lean on each other in times of need. And it is how we get sh*t done.

All of us today are part of a larger community tasked with possibly the greatest feat of human endeavour and creativity in our short history. We are, in many ways, pilgrims tasked with finding a way forward, the path that will take us on that long journey home through regeneration and redistribution to equity, equality and resilience. We've already started that journey but none of us will end it. We already follow in the footsteps of those brave early few and more will come after us. We hold the baton. For now. We are and we have community. And with community comes strength.

Now we need space. We must find those spaces for the community to come together, to walk in each other's shoes and to learn. It is in these spaces that we must recharge, regenerate and re-engage, time after time. It is here, that, against the abstract of numbers so many of us deal with on a daily basis, that we must storytell. It is here we must listen to the stories of who we really are - and embrace our and others deepest fears and aspirations. Not as financiers, or business leaders, but as humans - flawed, imperfect, and scared.

Stories move people. They help us understand who we are, where we've come from and where we are going. Numbers don't, numbers need language around them to make sense. And, contrary to popular belief, not everything is designed to be measured. We must be willing to accept that and to work in the space between spaces, where numbers fade and stories prevail.

Those of who have found these spaces and our own stories need to open them up and invite more in. Exclusivity breeds contempt. As much as we need spaces, we need to really bring ourselves to those spaces. We must embrace our deepest fears and our most passionate desires and bring both to the table. We must become servant leaders in the pursuit of each other’s causes, and in the delivery of our collective story. We all pursue the same things – the sense we matter, somewhere where we belong, and pride in who we are and what we do (our purpose). We must break bread with those who choose to throw bread.?We must encourage them to stop, to talk, to share. We must learn how to help them do this. We will have to connect in a way that binds us together as a real force for good and preserve the sanctuaries and the spaces that allow us do so as well as identifying more. We must support each other and carry those who tire for as along as they need the lift, as they will carry us.

Community is togetherness. Community is action. Community is progress.

Find that space within the space and hold yourself there for a moment or two every day. Let any fear wash over you, give it a voice, listen to it. Ultimately you decide whether you give it a vote. Encourage others to find their space and help them learn how to hold it in love and with integrity. We have a long road ahead but none of is alone. Fear cannot and will not win. We have been given a gift. Let's accept it with grace, and more than a little excitement for the opportunity it presents. And ego, well, leave it at home please. It's about as welcome as a dog at a game of skittles.

Thank you Sarah Birrell Ivory for giving me the idea to post it here.