The Day I Became a Manager

"I have promoted you to Manager."

I still remember the day my boss told me those words. It seems like a century ago :) “People naturally follow you” he added. His words made me proud but also filled me with doubt. “Was I really ready for this?” “Am I really up to these tasks?” Just as many others who begin leading, I didn’t feel very legitimate. Sound familiar? :)

On the same day, a VP I greatly admired called to congratulate me. He was sharp, outspoken, and had that signature English sense of humor. He gave me advice which I have carried with me ever since: “It’s no longer about you. It’s about them. You’re in charge of taking care of them. And you need to learn how to delegate and trust them.”

From Doing to Leading

Success in leadership is not about personal success; it’s making others successful. The transition from a “doer” to an “enabler” requires a fundamental mindset shift. As an individual contributor, your success is measured by your personal output. But as a manager, your role is to guide and empower others. Delegation doesn’t come naturally—it requires trust and a willingness to let go of tasks you might excel at yourself.

I remember a time when I struggled to delegate a critical project. Letting go felt risky, but trusting my team member not only delivered great results but also boosted their confidence and engagement. Moving from “doing” to “leading” can feel counterintuitive at first, but it’s essential to master your new role.

Getting promoted within your team adds another layer of complexity. Suddenly, colleagues you worked alongside now report to you, and the dynamics shift. When I first stepped into this role, I realized that earning their trust and proving myself as a leader would require a lot of effort. Staying authentic while setting boundaries was key. I had to show that, while I hadn’t fundamentally changed as a person, I was capable of leading with integrity and deserving of their confidence. I wasn’t just one of them anymore (at least for now); I was their manager.

Learning Through Action

Back then, I didn’t have a “manual for being the perfect manager.” I just observed leaders I admired and tried out their approaches. A few really stood out—they were great communicators, connected with their teams, gave useful feedback, and inspired people. Their style clicked with me, and I wanted to follow their lead.

When I first stepped into the role, I felt intimidated, especially when team members knew more about certain topics than I did. But here’s the truth: that’s actually a good thing! Your job isn’t to know everything—it’s to lead. If you hire and support the right people, they’ll do amazing work, and that success reflects on you. Your role is to guide them and have their back, not to compete with them. When they shine, you shine.

Learn from your team, but don’t act like you have to teach them everything. Be curious instead. They know so much, and you can gain a lot just by asking questions, listening carefully, and digging deeper. You’ll learn more than you expect.

But it wasn’t just about learning. I also had to earn trust to truly develop my own leadership style.

Building Trust and Leading by Example

I’ve always admired charismatic leaders who lead by example and show were great communicator. Dan, Ujesh, Rob, Bob, I aspired to be one of them. I didn’t want to mess up my new role; I wanted my team to trust me. But I also wanted to remain true to myself, not create a persona just because I was in a leadership position. I believe my authentic self served me well.

I communicated with everyone as I always had, providing feedback when needed and aligning the team on common goals to ensure everyone understood exactly what was expected of them and by when. I wanted them to see how their actions impacted not just the team but also the company’s broader objectives.

This mindset was something I learned early in life, both as a kid and during my time in the military. If you mess up, it affects your team. It was my mantra for telling people the ripple effects of their actions.

Of course, I wasn’t perfect. I’m sure I made mistakes along the way. But those mistakes made me more authentic. It was totally fine with me that my team saw I wasn’t invincible. I wanted them to know that making mistakes was okay. In fact, I actively encouraged them. I’ve always believed that people who never make mistakes are likely playing it too safe, staying in their comfort zones. I wanted everyone to push their limits. The more confident they became in their abilities, the more they could achieve, and the more I would shine as a leader.

Trusting the team without micromanaging, giving them space to think and produce, was a strategy that worked well for me. It was no longer about managing day-to-day tasks but about seeing the bigger picture. My responsibility was to connect each person’s work to the company’s vision and guide them toward achieving it.

But as I worked on growing my own leadership skills, I realized I needed to help my team succeed by developing the skills they needed to fill in the gaps to reach their full potential.

Empowering and Coaching Others

Developing others felt natural to me, and I absolutely loved it. It was the most challenging but rewarding part of management, and seeing my team grow reassured me that I was on the right path in my role as a leader.

My role wasn't one of task management but of taking care of people. Coaching, mentoring, and building up these team members to become super leaders started to become my absolute priority. This process required patience, empathy, and a real investment in other people's success.

All that was required from me was to let go and provide space to empower the team. I learned to ask only constructive questions and let them arrive at solutions that would work best. My only focus was to create an environment of openness and collaboration rather than slipping into micromanaging.

Asking simple yet powerful questions like "Where can we improve?" or "What would you recommend?" sparked productive conversations. Everyone’s input was valued, but my hidden goal was to help them discover their own answers. I knew they already had the solutions; they just needed the confidence to act on them. My role was to facilitate that moment of realization, that instant when they thought, "Oh, I had the answer all along."

Taking Responsibility

I learned to take responsibility when something went wrong. “Leadership comes with accountability”. Upper management would look at me for answers, and I needed to shield my team from unnecessary stress while standing up for them. When mistakes happened, I acknowledged them quickly, proposed a solution, and shared my learnings with the team. These experiences reinforced our collaboration and increased the trust among us.

A Journey of Learning

Leadership is a skill that takes time to learn; be easy on yourself. Learn from the leaders around you, or get support from a coach or trainer to help you through your transition. You’ll learn as you go; sometimes you’ll get it right, and other times, you’ll learn the hard way. Remember, success is all about the team. As a manager, your real success is “theirs”. Spend your time “serving” your team, helping them do their best, stay confident, and engaged. When you do, good results will come naturally.

Well, here it is; my story of being promoted to manager. I hope it helps at some point during your own transition to the role of a manager. If you ever want to share your doubts, exchange ideas, or hear another perspective, I’d be happy to chat.