Step Down from The Happiness Treadmill ~ 5-Step Framework to a Higher Happiness Quotient

Do you remember that moment in your life when all you wished for was a job promotion? Oh, and you wanted that beautiful car - which one was it - Mercedes or an Audi? Wishing for a foreign vacation, getting married or retirement. All you could focus on was that if that happens, then you are set. You will be content. You will live 'happily' ever after.

But what happens, in reality, is typically the reverse of it. As soon as you are promoted, you have more pressure, more expectations, projects, people to manage, reviews, and you also need to maintain your individual contributions. Alas, the happiness, the ecstasy has undergone a free fall. The bubble just burst. You are thrown back to your set point. The usual life.

This is the concept of 'The Happiness Treadmill' or 'The Hedonic Treadmill'.

In the 1970s, two psychologists, Brickman and Campbell, came up with the concept of hedonic adaptation. Hedonism is a school of thought that sees well-being as black and white - you are seeking pleasure and avoiding suffering. A couple of decades later, Michael Eysenck compared hedonic adaptation to a treadmill and thus was born the Hedonic Treadmill or the Happiness Treadmill.

What it simply means is that if you win a lottery, within a few months, the spike in happiness will be gone and you will return to your baseline. God forbid, but if you suffer a paralysis, again, within a few months that deep state of sorrow will disappear and you will be back to your baseline.

Sonja Lyubomirsky in her book, The How of Happiness, shares that each person has a set point, determined by the genes one has. It is responsible for about 50% of the happiness for an individual. So if you are dealt the wrong cards, too bad, you will return to your set point after every event.

But that makes us feel hopeless. It seems that our happiness is not in our control. 50% of it is dependent on the set point.

Look at the brighter side - you still have control over the rest of your happiness quotient. The circumstances might be hard to change but you can control the 40% variable by taking voluntary actions and making choices that make you happy.

Happiness = Set Point (S) + Circumstances (C) + Voluntary Actions (V)

                50%              10%                  40%

We have studied the science and looked at the maths, but how does it help you and me? What should we do to make sure we are happy?

Get off the treadmill and embrace what you have

Easier said than done but that is your best option. Stop chasing more. Wanting more. Whether its money, fame, knowledge, promotion, education, food or whatever - you need to stop the urge of wanting more and embracing what you have. You were not sent on the planet to participate in a race. It's called life because it is meant to be lived and is not some kind of competition.

Become AGILE. Well, not the literal meaning of the word AGILE but the acronym. Through the 400+ interviews I did through 2016-17 (Instagram/website), there were a few common themes. Since then, I have been working on making happiness attainable and that made me create this simple AGILE framework for happiness.

A - Awareness - This to me is like a super-power. If you want to lead a happier life then you need to build awareness. Awareness of how you are feeling. Awareness of what others are going through. Awareness of wanting more. Awareness of hitting the pause. Awareness of running on the treadmill or stepping down. In all moments of life, you need to bring your full awareness. Be mindful.

G - Gratitude - Be thankful for the big and small things in life. Whether its food, a job that pays, friends and family or good health - be grateful. And if nothing else, feel blessed for the body you have been given and how you can use it to create a positive impact on your self and on others around you.

I - Invest in yourself - You are the most important person in your life. But don't let that make you arrogant. Invest in your health - mental, emotional, spiritual and physical. You need you to stay happy and to have an impact on your circle.

L - Love - The root of all relationships. The pure emotion. Can you elevate your love from self to family, to community to society and to humanity? Can you feel the same sense of appreciation, affection, and care for all living beings?

E - Execute your dreams - The pain of failure is much better than the pain of regret. Do what you have always dreamt of. Your dreams have the power of changing the world but they won't do anything until you execute - you act. Stop procrastinating, start doing.

What are you going to do differently after reading this? Are you on a happiness treadmill? How do you plan to break away and find yourself? Reach out to me or simply comment below and let's have a conversation. When you have coffee and happiness... what more do you need?