Step #5: Find Partners (an excerpt)

This is an excerpt from my book/workbook: OWN IT! 5.5 Steps for Managing Your Career and Performance. I am sharing it because of my core belief that individuals own their development and organizations(great ones) own the support. I hope it is thought and ACTION provoking

Some context . . . this is Step #5. The other steps are:

• Step #1: Own It
• Step #2: Cultivate Self-Awareness
• Step #3: Create a Target
• Step #4: Commit to Mastery
• Step #5.5: Hone the Habits

Step #5: Find Partners

Through my role in Shifting Gears, I had the opportunity to partner with more than 150 individuals on a journey to work, sometimes involving significant career changes. By far, the prevailing observation I heard from participants was the benefit they received from the networking required as part of their work with us. For all the things these programs offered, it was the conversations people had with others along the way that made the difference.

A trend in leadership development as well as personal health has appeared in the last 10 years; the most common terms associated with it are mindfulness and presence. The universal truth is that when we increase our own presence and awareness in conversations, they become more than just words exchanged - because those words come with real feelings, perceptions, and back stories that make it a real connection.

These observations of the individuals in Shifting Gears showed me that, more often than not, support is the primary missing ingredient in a career journey.

When it is missing, here are the key mistakes people make when they first start their journey:

1. Journeys without support are harder: When historic explorers have delved into the wilderness to learn or be tested - Sir Ernest Shackleton, Sir Edmond Hillary, Columbus, Lewis and Clark, the Pilgrims - they all had help, and they were successful (i.e. they survived and accomplished something). An entrepreneur friend shared an observation with me one year into his first solo startup: "I now have a better appreciation for starting a business on your own - it is hard! I much prefer having partners to work with."
2. Bringing support is about bringing the right people: We know the answer; it's there. Sometimes it's just hard to see through all the life that's happening around us. Being questioned and having to answer can bring clarity. When we open ourselves to questions, the answers within us often emerge. Every journey should have someone to coach us, challenge us, make us smarter, and comfort us. Picking your team is key.
3. Yes, we are asking for help when we invite others, and that is hard to do - admit it! Being listened to provides energy and stamina for us. By definition, a conversation can only happen when there is someone to speak and there is someone to listen. We all have bad days. In any career journey, it's good to have someone who - on those bad days - will just listen. Having a safe place to unload frustration or share disappointment is a well in the desert. The hidden fact is, they will also have bad days and being able to help others is also energizing! So this is a source of energy for you both ways.

These roles are not having more 'best friends'. They're about intentionally joining communities of people in which you will get to know others who will see you work. We build relationships through getting to know each other, working together, and establishing trust.

The top two things you can do today to build your network are:

1. Assess your current network: Using the worksheet on the next page, make a list of 30 people with whom you have strong relationships: friends, relatives, neighbors, people you've worked with. For each of the three roles above, where would each name fit? When you fill in all the names, what gaps are evident? Gaps are opportunities for action. The next step is to test the resiliency of your network using the following questions: What does the list look like if you remove your spouse or family members? If you remove co-workers? Are there too many Comforters and not enough Challengers? If so, you won't have enough people to push you when you get stuck.
2. Build your community/network: Commit to two events per month where you get out of your business and your typical circle of friends and meet people who share similar interests or passions. Then, work with them. Examples of such events could include boards, professional organizations, chamber get-togethers, volunteering with your kids' activities, or forming a neighborhood group.

Leave this section with one final thought: this step is about intentionally cultivating strong and healthy relationships with people that will provide critical conversations along your journey. The added beauty of these relationships is that some will be truly reciprocal ones, and you will be asked to play some of these critical roles for others. In my experience of guiding and being guided, being included is like being giving food and water: it will become your fuel.

About the Author: Scott Patchin is an Expert EOS Implementer, and has a passion for 'maximizing growth and minimizing pain, to help leaders and teams move to and past the tipping point of success.' If you are on a journey to be a leader/person of impact, take a look at his other books and workbooks that are available on Amazon. Learn more about Scott on his website, or his YouTube channel, where he is always adding to his library of 60+ videos.